Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-07
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Competition acts as a great motivator for you to do your absolute best in anything, but when does competitive behaviour become disadvantageous? Often times, people feel obligated to surpass their peers in whatever it may be, from school to work, in order to feel validated and successful. Hence, it intensifies your drive to achieve something. However, cooperation is just as, if not even more effective and fruitful than competition. This essay will cover the reasons as to why I believe cooperation is a lot more efficient and superior to competition, and why it is a healthier approach to success in the future.
When you are in an academic or professional setting, you are likely surrounded by people who are very hardworking and are therefore quite appreciated for the work that they put in to achieve their goals. As a result of jealousy or feeling invalidated due to the attention that such people receive, you develop a competitive mindset where your primary goal is to surpass their level and reach the finish line before them. Hence, it could be seen as an advantageous trait to possess as it acts as your main drive to do the best in your work. I am a victim of this mindset, and so are many people around me. In school, I tried my hardest to hold on tight to my position as a top student, often powered by my overwhelming desire to remain ahead of my peers. I saw them as enemies I must overpower in a competition. Eventually, this began to manifest into a negative characteristic that slowly ruined my mental health.
Though such a trait allowed me to remain on top of my studies and achieve great grades, it led to the deterioration of my friendships. I started basing my worth on my ability to remain ahead of them in any way possible when it came to academics, that it drained me of my energy and weakened my relations with others because my behaviour was quite extreme. Hence, I learned to adopt a more cooperative mindset. It was one that allowed me to work and communicate with my mates better with little stigma. Cooperation gives you the opportunity to see others as people who are trying to make it through this period just like you, rather than an obstacle to be defeated. It stops you from viewing everyone as enemies but rather friends you can lean on when you face difficulties. It is a lot more efficient in the long run in comparison to competition alone. It is especially a useful trait in work where you are in forced proximity with your colleagues and are expected to perform tasks together frequently.
In conclusion, I strongly believe that adopting a cooperative mindset is a lot better than relying on competition alone to get through your studies and work. Cooperation humanises your peers, competition villianises them. It is absolutely possible to achieve phenomenal results without competition. Teamwork is significantly more fruitful, both mentally and physically.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.5 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The response addresses all parts of the prompt, discussing both the benefits of competition and the advantages of cooperation while maintaining a clear personal position throughout. The ideas are well-developed, particularly the personal anecdote regarding academic pressure, which provides a concrete illustration of the negative impacts of excessive competition. The essay is balanced, though the discussion of competition could have been slightly more nuanced to avoid over-generalisation. The conclusion effectively synthesises the argument, reinforcing the writer's stance. Overall, the response is well-focused and meets the requirements of the task effectively.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay demonstrates a clear logical progression. Each paragraph has a central theme, and the transition between the discussion of competition and the shift toward cooperation is smooth. Cohesive devices such as 'However', 'As a result', and 'In conclusion' are used effectively to guide the reader. Paragraphing is logical and contributes to the overall clarity of the argument. While some of the linking is slightly repetitive, the structure is coherent and easy to follow throughout the response.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
The vocabulary is sufficient and generally precise, allowing for a natural flow of ideas. The writer uses some sophisticated collocations and phrases, such as 'deterioration of my friendships', 'forced proximity', and 'overwhelming desire'. There is an attempt to use less common vocabulary, which is mostly successful. While there are minor instances where word choice could be more academic (e.g., 'mates' is slightly informal for an academic essay), the range is adequate to convey complex ideas clearly and effectively.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.5
The essay displays a good mix of simple and complex sentence structures. The writer demonstrates control over punctuation and sentence construction, with the majority of sentences being error-free. There are occasional minor slips, such as the phrasing 'Often times' (should be 'Oftentimes' or 'Often') and the slightly awkward construction '...academics, that it drained me', but these do not impede communication. The use of complex structures, such as conditional clauses and relative clauses, is generally accurate and contributes to the overall fluency of the writing.
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