Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-14
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Nowadays, in my country there is a competition in every place. In school also student have competitions with their classmate, in office with their colleagues have competition. Some people believe that competition at work, at school and in daily routine is a good thing. Others think that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. This essay discusses both the perspectives before giving my opinion.
On the one hand, Competition can be a highly positive tool for a child's upbringing, but its impact depends entirely on whether it is framed as a healthy drive for self-improvement or an unhealthy obsession with winning. When managed correctly, competition prepares children for real world challenges, builds emotional maturity, and teaches them that failure is a natural stepping stone to success. For example, Comparing oneself to coworkers is a form of social comparison theory, and it can be a highly effective driver for career growth. When you see a colleague succeeding, it can act as a benchmark for what is possible, pushing you to work harder, focus more, and upgrade your skills. Therefore, it id clear why some people support this view.
On the other hand, some people argue that we should focus on cooperating more rather than competing against each other, as competition has certain drawbacks. This is due to the fact that without competition, people cannot prove themselves in the workplace. For instance, employees may become less motivated to improve their skills and achieve better results if there is no competitive environment.
However, I believe that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing because it is more beneficial in the long term.
In conclusion, both views have their own advantages and disadvantages. However, I believe that competition in every place is benefits overall.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The essay addresses both views and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is inconsistent. While the first body paragraph provides some reasoning, the second body paragraph is contradictory; it introduces the 'cooperation' perspective but then argues that without competition, people cannot prove themselves, which actually supports the first view rather than the second. This logical inconsistency weakens the response. To reach a higher band, ensure that each paragraph clearly supports the specific viewpoint it is meant to discuss and provide more balanced, logical development for both sides of the argument.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, and there is an attempt to use cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion'. However, the progression of ideas is hampered by the logical flaw in the second body paragraph. The transition between the argument for cooperation and the subsequent claim about the necessity of competition is abrupt and confusing. Additionally, some referencing is slightly mechanical. Improving the logical flow between sentences and ensuring that cohesive devices are used to connect related ideas—rather than just signaling the start of a paragraph—would improve the coherence of the essay.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, with some attempts at more sophisticated phrasing like 'social comparison theory' and 'emotional maturity'. However, there are instances of repetitive or imprecise word choices, such as 'competition in every place' and 'competition is benefits overall'. The range is sufficient to convey meaning, but it lacks the flexibility and precision required for higher bands. To improve, focus on using more varied collocations and avoiding repetitive phrasing by using synonyms or more precise academic terminology.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'student have competitions' (subject-verb agreement), 'in office with their colleagues have competition' (missing subject/awkward syntax), and 'it id clear' (typo). While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding the message, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall fluency. To improve, pay closer attention to subject-verb agreement and sentence construction, and proofread for minor slips that detract from the professional tone of the writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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