Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some individuals believe that the involvement of competition at working place, in school life and in daily life is a beneficial thing while the other people's perspective is that the cooperation among people is far more beneficial than competing against each other .I partially agrees to both statements and my opinion on these precautionary action is evaluated in the ensuing paragraph.

The perspective of some people that the sense of competition is crucial and good thing is somehow valid as numerous people work hard when they feel competition. They are passionate to win so they give their level best and it happens in many fields of life. Such as, the competition in educational sector is emerging the good results and it encourages the pupils to get good grades so that they might get the achievements in their lives.

On the contrary, some times this competition among people might lead them to some difficulties as well as depression as some individuals might not be able to cope up with this stress. For instance, the heavy stress of getting good results in exams might lead students to mental distress and illness. Sometimes it results in some devastating consequences.

Furthermore, the people that claims cooperation might have positive impact rather that competing is also valid as working in groups enhances the knowledge.The people gets to experience the with with different mindsets as well as it may take less time to complete the task in groups.

In conclusion to conclude that, the both perspectives that the competition among people and the cooperation among people are both somehow valid.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion, though the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention the benefits of competition and cooperation, the arguments remain at a surface level. For example, the point about 'mental distress' is a good start, but it could be expanded with more specific consequences or examples to fully develop the argument. Your position is stated in the introduction, but it is not consistently maintained or clearly integrated throughout the body paragraphs. To improve, ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and provides more depth to support your claims.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or repetitive. Phrases like 'On the contrary' and 'Furthermore' are used correctly, but the transitions between sentences within paragraphs can be abrupt. The concluding paragraph is very brief and lacks a clear summary of the main points, which affects the overall flow. Improving the use of referencing (e.g., using 'this' or 'these' to link back to previous ideas) and ensuring a more robust conclusion would enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, allowing you to express your ideas clearly. There are some instances of awkward phrasing, such as 'precautionary action' (which does not fit the context of competition) and 'emerging the good results'. Additionally, there are minor errors in word choice, such as 'the people that claims' (should be 'claim') and 'experience the with with'. To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise collocations and avoiding repetitive phrasing. Expanding your vocabulary to include more academic, topic-specific terms would also be beneficial.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('I partially agrees', 'the people gets') and awkward sentence construction ('the involvement of competition at working place'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some missing spaces after periods and unnecessary commas. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your message, they are frequent enough to limit the score. Focus on proofreading for basic agreement and ensuring that complex sentences are constructed accurately.

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