Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people think that competition at work, at school, and in daily life is a good thing, but on the other hand, people believe that we should try to cooperate more with each other rather than compete. In the paragraph i am going to discuss both views.

Firstly, I believe that a competitive environment gives us more challenges to achieve our goals, within which we build confidence, and we are more focused on our work or achieving those things. However, in school time, we mostly focused on maintaining high or top scores in the class compare the other. we compite them in all sectors like school collage and in sports so we can show our stand to others. Secondly, it makes us more focused and active people in our lives because of competition; we never forget our goals to achieve; we are constantly focusing till we reach them. For example, in school time, mostly our goals to be a 1 ranker in class, so we totally dedicated our self to becoming a 1 ranker and constantly maintain that place.

On the other hand, To competing other we forget our living life style or we totally dedicate to achieving or winning in the competition it damages our mental health and we gone in deepration if we do not achieve that goal or win the competition. Additionaly we loss all our human happiness you are alone in that zone and their is no one in with you. Example if we doing preparation of government job and we are not getting selection over 3 years that time we mentally distab and not accept the truth it is not for us.

to conclude As a human we have to be a competative of your life it give a challanging life so you can achieve your goals without competition you are not become a serious on your goals. Otherside sometime with our knowledge we should help the other either to competed them.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion, fulfilling the basic requirements of the task. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument regarding the negative impact of competition on mental health is relevant but lacks depth and specific, well-explained examples. The conclusion is also slightly contradictory, as it suggests we must be competitive to be serious, yet the body paragraph highlights significant drawbacks. To improve, you should ensure that your supporting points are fully expanded with clear, logical reasoning rather than relying on repetitive statements about 'goals'.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. Phrases like 'In the paragraph i am going to discuss' are unnecessary and informal. There are also issues with referencing and logical flow; for example, the transition 'Additionaly we loss all our human happiness' is abrupt and lacks a clear connection to the previous sentence. The use of linking words is sometimes repetitive, and the overall progression of ideas within paragraphs could be smoother to ensure a more professional academic tone.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary range is limited and often repetitive, relying heavily on basic terms like 'goals', 'competition', and 'achieve'. There are several instances of word-choice errors and non-standard collocations, such as 'we gone in deepration' (likely meaning depression) and 'mentally distab' (likely meaning disturbed). These errors occasionally impede the reader's understanding. To reach a higher band, you need to demonstrate a wider range of vocabulary, including less common lexical items and more precise collocations, while ensuring that spelling and word formation are accurate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay relies primarily on simple sentence structures, and attempts at complex sentences often contain grammatical errors. There are frequent issues with subject-verb agreement, tense consistency, and punctuation. For example, 'we compite them in all sectors like school collage' contains spelling errors and incorrect preposition usage. Additionally, the sentence 'to conclude As a human we have to be a competative of your life' is grammatically fragmented and confusing. Improving your control over basic sentence construction and reducing the frequency of errors is essential for achieving a higher score.

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