Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-19

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

It is extensively acknowledged that in professional in education or in daily life aspect works competitor plays a vital role.some people think we ought to be coperate each other instead of fighting increasing competition.In upcoming paragraphs both notions are discussed with personal stand point.

To commence with, competition always increase creativity among society to tackle others knowledged it also generate curiosity to become more perfect than others.To elaborate, always better competitor motivate us to become better as him or her alng with if compition is hard than it also teach us to do more hustle to achieve our goals and most important it teach there is always present better than us.For instance, The organisation Gemeni solutions is the world most figure out companies to get a job in this every year 12000 employers register there name and out of that only 5000 are selected.Hence,it generate more harder partner to compete also teach such habbits like discipline.

However, it is better to run in race or to produce challenges for other weak learners to coperate with each other.To explicate,sometimes those who are not good in academics or in any field they feel demotivate by facing the over advanced individual in their field moreover a company is generated by discussion or by unity in groups unity in thoughts.For example, a company was started in 2024 the company generate peices of softwares and over the duration of two years hired more than [redacted phone] workers and it growth rose dramatically.Thus, solidarity makes bond among demographics.

Agglomerating a aforementioned points competition is beneficial to create more demanding workers therefore, discussion is more positive improvement as growing challenges .I also personally support second notion.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is often hindered by unclear phrasing and limited logical progression. For example, the explanation of why competition increases creativity is somewhat repetitive, and the example regarding 'Gemeni solutions' is vague and lacks a clear connection to the broader argument. While the prompt is addressed, the ideas are not fully extended or supported with sufficient depth, leading to a somewhat superficial treatment of the topic. The conclusion is present but lacks a strong summary of the main points discussed.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the flow between and within them is often disjointed. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'To commence with' and 'However', but they are sometimes used mechanically or incorrectly, such as 'Agglomerating a aforementioned points'. The referencing is occasionally unclear, making it difficult for the reader to follow the logical progression of the argument. Paragraphing is present, but the internal structure of the paragraphs lacks the necessary cohesion to guide the reader smoothly through the points being made.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The range of vocabulary is limited and often inaccurate. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'in education or in daily life aspect works competitor plays a vital role' and 'generate peices of softwares'. The student attempts to use more academic vocabulary, but these attempts often result in unnatural phrasing, such as 'Agglomerating a aforementioned points'. These errors occasionally impede communication, requiring the reader to re-read sentences to grasp the intended meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay relies heavily on simple sentence structures, and attempts at complex sentences are frequently marred by grammatical errors. There are persistent issues with subject-verb agreement, article usage, and word order, for instance: 'competition always increase creativity' and 'it teach there is always present better than us'. Punctuation is also inconsistent, with missing spaces after periods and commas. While the meaning is generally discernible, the high frequency of grammatical errors significantly impacts the overall quality of the writing.

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