Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

These days, there has been a lot of talk about competition. This essay will delve deeper into the possible punitive reasons, viewpoint, overviews, and advantages causing this scenario before presenting my school of thought in the ensuing paragraph with sufficient and relevant examples.

At first glance, there are several reasons in support of my context, but the most obvious one is that with the help of competition we know where we stand in the particular field, so we can improve ourselves. For example, one survey conducted by "the Daily News" revealed that the majority of people are responsible for this phenomenon, while only a few are

aware of it. As a result, it is clear why a large number of people agree with the aforementioned position.

My point is further supported by that by product of competition generates innovation, increase quality, encourages improvement , an decrease in price. A famous non-governmental organization has been working to overcome this situation, and they suggest that the government needs to spread awareness and educate people for the betterment of society. Thus this will not only raise living standards but also make individuals more cautions and practical in their approach.

on the other hand. there are many disadvantages of doing competition, like constant competition make mental situation more stressful, can lead to price war, due to competition relation become weaker, pressure to succeed, smaller businesses may have to struggle.

To recapitulate, it may be argued that, even through there are many causes, overviews, viewpoints, arguments, pros as well as negatives of doing competition. Lastly, it seems to me that it is a wide idea to use such options, ad they are pragmatic as well for a human being on Earth. In order to foster global wealth, productivity, and a fine environment, citizens are urged to abide by the relevant laws and regulations.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The essay addresses both sides of the argument, but the development of ideas is superficial. The introduction is cluttered with unnecessary, vague terminology like 'punitive reasons' and 'overviews' that do not relate to the prompt. While you mention the benefits of competition (innovation, quality) and the drawbacks (stress, strained relationships), these points are listed rather than explored with depth. The example regarding 'the Daily News' is vague and lacks a clear connection to the argument. To improve, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, well-explained idea supported by a concrete, logical example rather than listing multiple points without elaboration.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the progression of ideas is often disjointed. The use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or misused, such as the transition 'At first glance' which does not fit the context of the argument. Referencing is occasionally unclear, particularly in the third paragraph where the link between the 'non-governmental organization' and the argument about competition is tenuous. The conclusion is repetitive and fails to clearly summarise your own opinion, instead using vague phrases like 'it is a wide idea'. Improving the use of linking words and ensuring each sentence flows logically from the previous one is essential.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and often used inaccurately. Phrases like 'punitive reasons', 'my context', and 'wide idea' suggest a lack of precision and an attempt to use complex-sounding words without understanding their meaning. There are also issues with collocation, such as 'doing competition' instead of 'competing' or 'engaging in competition'. While the meaning is generally understandable, the lack of variety and the frequent misuse of vocabulary prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on using common words accurately before attempting more sophisticated academic vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but errors are frequent and sometimes impede clarity. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'competition... make mental situation') and article usage (e.g., 'due to competition relation become weaker'). Punctuation is also problematic, with several sentence fragments and run-on sentences, such as the list of disadvantages in the fourth paragraph. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring that subjects and verbs agree, and using commas and periods correctly to separate distinct thoughts.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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