Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In today 's world , competition with other is an increasingly prevalent issue that impacts various aspects of our daily life . Some people believe that competition at work place or at school and in daily life is a valuable thing , however some argue that one should try to cooperate . This essay will discuss both perspectives before explaining why i believe that cooperation is more valuable .

On one hand , in this contemporary world , competition with other highlights the main concern . Although there are plethora of favorable benefits as well . Firstly , when an individual try to beat someone , they try to boost up one's potential which left a positive impact on one' life . For instance - an average student who want to compete with a topper definitely work more harder to hit a specific score . As a consequences , he will learn to work more harder and become a disciplined person . Moreover, in our daily life as well , people often influenced by someone in a positive way , and want to become like them and start working on themself so that they can also acquire a good personality and they even work on their week points .

on other hand , despite of its benefits , it also has an adverse impact as well . When someone try to beat a competetor , they often sometime try wrong ways to achieve the target or to perform better then other . For example , one staff member may try to intrupt on other work , and even destroy their things , so that they might impress the boss . Apart from that , even looks also has a significant impact on society . They want to look more better then other and invest money in wrong things so that that they look more good and as a result they might harm oneself and their health as well .

In conclusion , although competition has a numerous advantages , but its advantage outweigh its disadvantage as one might harm oneself and even indulge in wrong activities just to be better then other

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The essay addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument regarding the negative impacts of competition is supported by examples that are slightly disjointed, such as the sudden shift to discussing physical appearance and spending money. While the prompt asks for a discussion of competition in work, school, and daily life, the response focuses heavily on general behavioral traits. To reach a higher band, you should ensure that each paragraph provides a more nuanced exploration of the topic, linking your examples more directly to the core argument rather than relying on generalizations.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'On one hand', 'Moreover', and 'In conclusion', which help guide the reader. However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly inaccurate, such as 'As a consequences' (should be 'consequence') and 'on other hand' (missing 'the'). Additionally, some sentences are linked in a way that feels repetitive. Improving the variety of your linking words and ensuring that referencing (e.g., 'they', 'them') is always clear will help improve the flow and coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'prevalent', 'contemporary', and 'adverse'. However, there are several instances of awkward collocation and word choice errors, such as 'work more harder' (should be 'work harder'), 'week points' (should be 'weak points'), and 'look more better' (should be 'look better'). These errors occasionally distract the reader. To improve, focus on learning common collocations and paying closer attention to the correct form of adjectives and adverbs. Expanding your vocabulary to include more precise academic terms would also be beneficial.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('an individual try', 'student who want') and article usage ('in today's world', 'in our daily life'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with unnecessary spaces before commas and periods. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to prevent the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on basic grammatical accuracy, such as ensuring verbs agree with their subjects, will significantly improve your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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