Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Due to the development of growing awareness, individuals around the world are profoundly concerned about the competition. Some individuals believe that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. In the case of others, the opposite is true. In this essay, i will present a full-fledged discussion on either stance prior to drawing a conclusion including my perception.

There are a considerable number of individuals out there who sincerely hold the belief that, some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing for it has a significant influence on people or children. To strengthen their stance, as a result, they put forward a compelling array of convincing arguments. Among them, the one that undoubtedly stands out is synonymous with improving their ability. In other words, on the condition that people work hard it has no surprise they will gain experience. To cite an example, we see many single-child students want to be first in exams because it is a competition for them. As a result, it brings absolutely positive impacts on students.

Instead of taking into account the former viewpoint, however, some people nurturing the opposite thought state that others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. To be more precise, in the event that people cooperate with others without any iota of doubt they will not reach goals before them. In consequence, it brings an undesirable impact for the people.

In essence, having thoroughly analysed the statement from various angles, it is needless to say that either side has strong arguments. However, I wholeheartedly believe that competition is a great influence for every individual to build their career.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The essay addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion in the conclusion. However, the development of ideas is limited. The arguments provided, such as 'improving ability' through competition, are somewhat superficial and lack specific, well-explained examples. The explanation of the cooperative viewpoint is particularly weak, as the sentence 'they will not reach goals before them' is confusing and does not clearly articulate why cooperation is beneficial. To improve, you should focus on expanding your points with more logical depth and concrete illustrations rather than relying on repetitive or vague phrasing.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression from the introduction to the body paragraphs and conclusion. You use cohesive devices like 'In other words', 'To cite an example', and 'In essence'. However, some transitions feel mechanical or slightly misused, such as 'In the case of others, the opposite is true' or 'In the event that people cooperate'. Additionally, some sentences are repetitive, which disrupts the flow. Improving the variety and naturalness of your linking phrases will help you achieve a higher band score.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary, attempting some sophisticated phrases like 'full-fledged discussion' and 'compelling array of convincing arguments'. However, there are instances of awkward word choice and collocation errors, such as 'the one that undoubtedly stands out is synonymous with improving their ability' (which is logically incorrect) and 'it has no surprise'. The vocabulary is sometimes used in a way that obscures meaning rather than enhancing it. Focus on using words in their correct context to ensure clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, many contain grammatical errors or awkward phrasing, such as 'Due to the development of growing awareness' and 'some people nurturing the opposite thought state that others believe that...'. There are also minor punctuation and capitalization issues (e.g., 'i' instead of 'I'). While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. You should work on sentence construction and ensuring subject-verb agreement.

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