Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

As far as this topic is concerned, competition at work place can enhance abilities to work in a competitive environment. If we talk specifically the competition between students can sometime plays a important role to polish there overall personality because these environment allows students to demonstrate their potential. While competing in daily life can cause some negative impact on society. For example, it can disturb social life and also people might don't want to engage with a person who has a competitive nature.

The substantial influence of competition has sparked the controversy over the potential impact that competing each other can make people rude towards other can damage the social fabric. Let's say if we teach school students to compete with their fellows in early stages of their childhood can cause long lasting impact on their social life. Furthermore, to be in competitive environment for a long time can socially isolate them and can cause long lasting impact of loneliness. It also has a negative impact on working places because it can block the creativity and full potential of an employee and make the environment toxic.

In my opinion, competition can be good thing in some circumstances like in working place can help employees to improve their personalities by challenging their time management skills and creativity. Other than opposing this idea entirely, we must not ignore its benefits. As far as competition at schools, students must not be allowed to show their academic dominance. In my opinion, it can be a great hurdle in sharing ideas and good relationship among students.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a personal opinion, meeting the basic requirements of the task. However, the development of ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the argument regarding competition in schools is repetitive, and the link between competition and 'toxic' work environments is mentioned but not fully explored with specific examples. The position is clear, but the supporting arguments lack depth and nuance, which prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. To improve, you should aim to expand on your points with more detailed explanations or concrete examples rather than listing potential negative impacts.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into three paragraphs, which is a logical structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally inaccurate. For example, the transition 'While competing in daily life' at the end of the first paragraph is grammatically awkward and does not effectively link the ideas. Furthermore, the progression of ideas within paragraphs is sometimes disjointed, particularly in the second paragraph where the transition between the 'social fabric' and 'school students' feels abrupt. Improving the variety and precision of your linking words would help the flow of your writing significantly.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'substantial influence,' 'social fabric,' and 'academic dominance.' However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'competing each other' (should be 'competing with each other') and 'working places' (should be 'workplaces'). Additionally, there are minor errors in word forms, such as 'can sometime plays a important role' (should be 'can sometimes play an important role'). While these errors do not impede communication, they limit the precision of your expression and prevent a higher score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors throughout. Common issues include subject-verb agreement ('competition... can sometime plays'), article usage ('a important role'), and pronoun reference ('polish there overall personality' instead of 'their'). Some sentences are also structurally incomplete or awkward, such as 'the competition between students can sometime plays a important role to polish there overall personality because these environment allows students to demonstrate their potential.' While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors indicates a lack of control over more complex grammatical forms.

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