Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-04
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In our daily life we deal with any type of competition at work, at school and any walk of life. Some people believe that we should try to cooperate with each other, other say that we should do competition with each other.In my perspective ,we should try to cooperate with each other at work ,at school or at many other places.
On the one hand , competition is not a good thing either it is in education or in other walk of life.Competition has negative effect socialy and environmentaly, if very do competition with our other fellow it make their our enemy which is very harmful for us or many other people.For instance living in a big or joint family we saw competition with our cusines or with age fellow it will demage our relationship wih other family members and also demage peace of our mind and our life.That 's why competition has negative effect.
On the other hand if we try to cooperate with each other it make good relationship with others and every body try to help each other in any situation.It has positive effect socially and enverionmentlly .At work or school and many other places become friends and will do respect of each other.In addition to this environment will be peaceful.For example ,in our family it is a big joint family system all brothers have kids and there is no competition between elders and children regarding money,education and work.Everybody help each other in all aspects of life ,and there is lot of love and respect for every one and have a peacefull environment.
At the end ,conclude to this competition has a negative effect on environment and other side cooperation has positive result at every one lives and people spend peacefull life.In my point of view, we should try to help each other rather than competition.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive. While you mention that competition has negative effects, the explanation relies on personal anecdotes rather than broader societal or professional analysis. To reach a higher band, you should expand on the 'why' and 'how' of these concepts with more sophisticated reasoning. For instance, you could discuss how competition might drive innovation in a workplace versus how it might stifle collaboration. The position is consistent, but the depth of the argument needs to be more academic and less anecdotal.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is quite mechanical and sometimes inaccurate. Phrases like 'On the one hand' and 'On the other hand' are used correctly, but the transitions between sentences within paragraphs are often abrupt. There is also some repetition of vocabulary, such as 'competition' and 'cooperation', which makes the flow feel a bit stilted. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each sentence logically follows the previous one would significantly improve the coherence of your writing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the range and precision required for higher bands. You rely on basic terms and repeat them frequently, such as 'good thing', 'bad thing', and 'negative effect'. There are also several spelling errors, such as 'socialy', 'environmentaly', 'cusines', and 'enverionmentlly'. To improve, you should focus on using more precise synonyms and ensuring correct spelling. Incorporating topic-specific vocabulary related to professional or educational environments would also help demonstrate a wider lexical range.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Issues include subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'it make their our enemy'), incorrect article usage, and punctuation errors, such as missing spaces after commas and periods. The sentence construction is often simplistic, and there is a lack of variety in complex structures. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence patterns, ensuring correct verb tenses, and proofreading for punctuation and common grammatical slips.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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