Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.0)
the given line chart compares the information about five different activities in social centre located in Melbourne, Australia for the period 2000 to 2020.
Overall, the film club take the dominance of highest amount of participants throughout the period, while table tennis experienced the most significant growth in compare with other four sections. In contrast, amateur dramatics decreased very sharply, and in 2015 it becomes the least popular activity by the end of the period.
In 2000, around 64 people attented the film club, and being stable until a slight decrease to approximately 60 in 2010. But it quickly recovered to about 64 in 2015 and marginally up to 66 at the end. The number of participants in martial arts changed slightly over the year, varying over 31 and 36 people before finishing at about 33 in 2020.
Table tennis, however, showed the good growth, starting at 16 participants in 2000, the line rose slightly to over 19 in 2010 before growing dramatically to about 51 by 2020. Meanwhile, amateur dramatics fell significantly starting from 25 participant to just 3 over the same period. In cotrast, Musical performances, which had 0 participants until 2005, rose gradually until finishing at about 16 by 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 1.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 1.0
The response is completely off-topic. The prompt asks for a discussion on the merits of competition versus cooperation in work, school, and daily life. However, the student has written a report describing a line chart about social centre activities. Because the response does not address the task prompt at all, it fails to meet the requirements for Task Achievement. Additionally, the response is significantly under the 250-word minimum, which further impacts the score. To improve, it is essential to carefully read the prompt and ensure the essay directly answers the specific question asked.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response is organized into paragraphs, and there is a basic attempt at logical progression with an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. However, because the content is entirely irrelevant to the prompt, the coherence is undermined. Cohesive devices such as 'In contrast', 'Meanwhile', and 'However' are used, but they serve to structure a report on data rather than an argumentative essay. The paragraphing is functional, but the lack of relevance to the task makes it difficult to assess the logical development of an argument.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is appropriate for describing a graph, including terms like 'dominance', 'significant growth', 'decreased very sharply', and 'marginally'. While these words are used correctly in the context of describing data, they do not demonstrate the range of vocabulary required for an argumentative essay on social or educational topics. There are some minor errors, such as 'in compare with' instead of 'compared to', and 'attented' (spelling). The range is adequate for a report but limited for the task requested.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'the film club take the dominance' (subject-verb agreement), 'in 2015 it becomes' (tense inconsistency), and 'varying over 31 and 36' (preposition error). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but the frequency of errors in basic grammar prevents a higher score. The student needs to focus on consistent verb tenses and correct preposition usage to improve accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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