Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-07

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Competition at school & at work environment is the topic of debate. Some individuals think that competition are impact good manner in our life, while others argue that it creates conflicts by competing against each other. I strongly support that competitions should be held at work places and at school. I will put both the views and discuss my opinions in forthcoming paragraphs.

On the one hand, arranging and holding competition with various categories to participate in, encourages pupils and adults to experiment with their abilities. Talking about competitions in schools provides an opportunity to test one's skill in bigger platform. Considering olympiad and intellectual quiz competition encourages individuals to participate and win the prizes. These competitions boost the general knowledge and also help to develop cognitive ability. Other competition such as, art, music and dance etc. contributes to develop extra-curriculum ability. Considering competition at work places, puts employers in a position that experience and expenditure beyond office work can help them to land in to bigger opportunities. Moreover, higher experience contributes to get them senior position along with higher salary expectations.

On the other hand, some competitions have the minimum requirements and ability benchmarks to participate in. In such cases not being capable enough to participate, creates self doubt in the individuals. Moreover, failing the opportunity also contributes for the same. These can led individual to suffer through mental disbalance including anxiety, depression and comparison with peers. Looking a broden scenario, each factors contribute to weaken the one's ability and self confidence.

To conclude, I must say that we should take competitions as an opportunity to test and develop our skill to reach to a professional level, rather than comparing to fellows.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat uneven. While the benefits of competition are explored with examples like olympiads and extracurricular activities, the discussion on the drawbacks is less detailed and relies on generalisations about mental health. The conclusion is brief and does not fully synthesise the arguments presented. To reach a higher band, you should ensure that both sides are balanced in terms of depth and that your personal opinion is more thoroughly integrated into the body paragraphs rather than just stated in the introduction.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organised into clear paragraphs, each with a central topic. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'On the one hand', 'Moreover', and 'To conclude', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are mechanical, and the logical flow within paragraphs could be smoother. For instance, the transition between discussing school competitions and work environments in the second paragraph is abrupt. Additionally, some referencing is slightly unclear, such as 'each factors contribute to weaken the one's ability', where the connection to the previous points could be more explicit. Improving the variety and naturalness of linking words will enhance the overall flow.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to express your ideas clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'cognitive ability', 'extra-curriculum', and 'self doubt'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'impact good manner', 'mental disbalance', and 'looking a broden scenario'. These errors do not impede communication, but they do limit the precision of your argument. To improve, focus on learning common collocations and using more academic phrasing to replace informal or slightly awkward expressions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While you attempt complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('competition are impact', 'each factors contribute') and article usage. There are also issues with prepositions and word forms, such as 'contributes to get them senior position' instead of 'helps them attain a senior position'. While these errors are noticeable, they rarely prevent the reader from understanding your meaning. To progress, focus on proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy and ensuring that your complex structures are formed correctly.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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