Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-11
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
It is often argued by some people that contest at work, at school and in daily life is a good activity. Meanwhile, others argue that have to try to cooperate more, instead of competing with each other. However, I believe that we should cooperate more rather than competing because it helps weaker people a lot.
On the one hand, supporters of competition at work, school and in daily life believe that by conducting contests helpful for the people who wants to achieve some reward of their struggle at their work, educational institute or in a daily routine. As companies or educational institutes will get great help by organizing different competitions to evaluate their participants. Take an example of Systems Limited Company that arrange a contest of sales which employee achieved highest score of sales get a cash reward and company became more aware of the capability of their staff. Thus, the supports of this view support their findings back their analysis with valid arguments.
While on the other hand, the advocates of the view that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other believed that with the help of cooperation we can grow the skills of weak people. As many people require more consultation instead of participating in different activities to improve themselves. For instance, a survey conducted in Teesside University revealed that around 90 percent of the students think that cooperation had more advantages than competition. Hence, this view also seems to carry a lot weightage.
However, in my opinion cooperation is far better for weaker people. As if a person had depression issues contest is not for that person.
To sum up, even through that6 competition in daily life had believers, but I believe that cooperation is far better for weaker people.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses both sides of the argument and provides a clear personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While the example of the 'Systems Limited Company' is relevant, the explanation of why cooperation is better is quite brief and relies on a very simplistic argument regarding 'depression issues.' To reach a higher band, you should expand on the benefits of cooperation in a more academic or professional context, perhaps discussing long-term team synergy or innovation, rather than focusing solely on individual emotional states. The conclusion is also quite repetitive and lacks a summary of the main points discussed.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. You use some cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand,' 'While on the other hand,' and 'To sum up.' However, the use of these devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly inaccurate, such as 'Thus, the supports of this view support their findings back their analysis.' Additionally, some sentences lack logical flow, particularly in the introduction where the second sentence is grammatically incomplete. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence would enhance the overall coherence.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on basic terms like 'good activity' and 'great help.' There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'carry a lot weightage' and 'contest of sales.' To improve, you should aim to use more sophisticated vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'incentivize,' 'collaborative environment,' or 'professional development.' The word 'contest' is used repeatedly where 'competition' would be more appropriate in an academic context. Expanding your range of synonyms and collocations will help you convey your ideas more effectively.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow of reading. For example, 'others argue that have to try to cooperate' is missing a subject, and 'the people who wants to achieve' contains a subject-verb agreement error. There are also issues with punctuation and word forms, such as 'even through that6 competition.' While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focusing on subject-verb agreement and ensuring every sentence has a clear subject will significantly improve your accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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