Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-17

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It is always argued that the competition at corporate world, educational and in daily life gives positive outcomes But many thinks that people should cooperate with each other rather than challenge. I firmly believe that both of the points have their own values and benefits and drawbacks side by side and they should try both of these randomly.

To begin with, people tend to take part in competitions for boosting their capabilities and want to enhance their abilities because challenging situations make individuals more profound and able to do their best at any situations.

If they will struggle more to achieve any goal, the chances of achieving the goal would be. Although in society and in psychology it is not seems ethical but it is must so once could know and improve their inner strength.

For instance, In family, office and educational institutes people beat each other in different activities like examinations, athletics and cooking or house hold works and oxytocin hormone releases in their body and a feeling of satisfaction more enhance their performance and skills positively.

Thus, its a beneficial thing that people do competitions.

On the other hand, Some individuals think not to compete with each other due to unnecessary quarrels, tensions, depressions and anxiety and break the peaceful links and relationships or connections with each other in daily and work life.

Because suffering from all of this things and not cooperating with each other with care and love and all the time try to do competitions in any situation could leads to a massive misunderstandings among them and specially children become more rigid and selfish plus their attitude towards others will be affect negatively.

For instance, while playing any game with each other, if children cooperate and help they definitely would be more pleased and comfortable and so as for adults in life.

Now, we should have make sense about all of this that equality and neutrality is the best policy for human cognitive development in this regard.

To conclude, I believe that if we do both the actions equally we can spend a good life with every aspect rather than compete or not compete we should carry both and balance the situations because both are necessary in life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses both parts of the prompt regarding the merits of competition versus cooperation, and clearly states an opinion in the introduction and conclusion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive. For example, the argument that competition releases oxytocin and enhances satisfaction is a bit biologically oversimplified and remains under-developed. Similarly, the discussion on cooperation focuses heavily on avoiding tension without exploring broader societal or economic implications. The position is maintained throughout, but supporting points would benefit from greater depth and more precise real-world examples to meet the higher band criteria.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is divided into an introduction, three body paragraphs, and a conclusion, showing a clear overarching structure. Paragraphing is utilised to separate the two competing views and your own conclusion. However, cohesion at the sentence level is frequently faulty or mechanical. Expressions like 'To begin with', 'On the other hand', and 'To conclude' are used, but intra-paragraph transitions are often clunky. For instance, the transition 'If they will struggle more to achieve any goal, the chances of achieving the goal would be' is incomplete and disrupts the flow of logic. Referencing is sometimes unclear, such as 'all of this things', which weakens overall cohesion.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary used is adequate to convey basic ideas, but it displays noticeable limitations and repetitive phrasing. You attempt some less common items such as 'profound', 'cognitive development', and 'oxytocin hormone', but these are occasionally misused or awkwardly placed. There are also frequent word-choice errors, such as 'the competition at corporate world' instead of 'the corporate world', 'do competitions' instead of 'compete', and 'make sense about all of this' instead of 'realise'. Spelling is generally acceptable, but the lexical range lacks the precision and flexibility required for higher band scores, frequently resulting in strained expressions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but grammatical control is weak. There are frequent errors in tense, article usage, and prepositions that impede readability at times. For example, 'It is always argued that the competition at corporate world... But many thinks' contains agreement errors and awkward phrasing. In the second paragraph, conditional structures are malformed: 'If they will struggle more to achieve any goal, the chances of achieving the goal would be.' Punctuation and run-on sentences also hinder clarity, such as the lengthy sentence beginning with 'Because suffering from all of this things...'. These frequent errors place the grammar firmly in the Band 5 category.

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