Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

competition is very powerful idea for anyones life to improve someones abilities .it also enhance the capablility of to do smomething new something big .it helps people to grow up , to move forward and also create the passion of never give up.

in school or on work place these type of activities my lead people towrds explore their thoughts theirs ideas .it also helpful for students to dig more and more new knowledge .it also works for their daily lives. it would be wounderf for their daily new invention of ideas. Competioton activity bring people towards seek more thoughtprovoking ideas also knowlege .it may leads them towards new information more knowledge .

Therefore, competion should be according to moralities .it should not be bifercate the students in groups of racial systems as well as uper and lower categories it shoult be consistant .it may harmful and badly effect their lives if it move towrds bad perspective , on wrong side.

Contrastly , both ideas are not bad .copetition is very good if it utilise according to the positive side if peope move towards bad side of this idea it can may leads them towards bad events or moments . it can effect their lives badly if people do not under stand the real purpose of competion .

Lastly , According to my opinoin competion is very highly recommended idea for life of every proffession ,for their growth which may mently , physically ,sipirtually . it would be very helpful for the people for their work place ,or for students lives . On the other hand competion may lead people towards bad side it can be effect their self respect their confidence if its not in good envoirnment .

To cap up the discussion, its very good idea ,for example in my sight i have a student who dont have a confidence to speak in front of other,he was very shy but now he is fully confedent with the passage of time beacuse i have polished him through the activity of competion .so according to my perspective it should must happen on every plateform or for every category of people .it will move them towards optimisim and also provide them condenfidence to move further and to do something new something big.it leaves positive effects on their lives .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to discuss both views regarding competition and cooperation, presenting an opinion that competition is highly beneficial when guided by moral principles. The student addresses the task by examining how competition enhances capabilities and fosters innovation in schools and workplaces. However, the development of ideas is limited and repetitive, with several points, such as the benefits of competition and the need for moral boundaries, restated multiple times without significant extension. Furthermore, the discussion of the opposing view (cooperation) is extremely brief and superficial ('both ideas are not bad'), which prevents the response from fully exploring both perspectives as required. Consequently, the ideas remain somewhat under-developed, aligning with a Band 5 performance for Task Achievement.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay displays basic organizational structure with clear paragraph breaks, including an introduction, body paragraphs, and a concluding remark. However, progression is frequently disrupted by abrupt transitions and repetitive statements. Cohesive devices are either missing, inadequate, or used inappropriately, such as 'Contrastly,' which is non-standard, and repetitive use of 'Therefore' and 'Lastly.' Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion is weak because sentences often lack logical links between them, leading to a disjointed reading experience. Pronoun referencing is occasionally unclear, as seen in phrases like 'it may harmful and badly effect their lives if it move towrds bad perspective.' These organizational and cohesive flaws place the response at Band 4.5, rounded to 5.0 for overall coherence efforts.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary used is basic, repetitive, and heavily constrained by frequent spelling and word-choice errors. Examples of basic terms include repeating 'competition', 'good thing', 'bad side', and 'ideas' excessively. There are numerous spelling errors throughout the text, such as 'capablility', 'smomething', 'wounderf', 'Competioton', 'bifercate', 'uper', 'shoult', 'consistant', 'envoirnment', 'opinoin', 'sipirtually', 'donst', 'confedent', and 'condenfidence'. While the student attempts some less common vocabulary such as 'thought-provoking' and 'moralities', inaccurate word choices and frequent misspellings impede communication and strain the reader. This performance aligns closely with the Band 4 descriptors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The writing demonstrates a very limited range of grammatical structures. Simple sentences predominate, and attempts at complex structures are consistently flawed by missing auxiliary verbs, incorrect prepositions, and faulty subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'these type of activities my lead people towrds explore', 'competion should be according to moralities .it should not be bifercate', 'it can be effect their self respect'). Punctuation is weak, characterized by missing capital letters at the beginning of sentences and improper spacing around periods and commas. Errors are frequent throughout the text, distorting meaning at times and consistently causing difficulty for the reader. This corresponds to a Band 4 grammatical performance.

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