Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Nowadays, competition plays a vital role in peoples' lives. Some people believe that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others argue that we should try to cooperate more, rather than cometing against each other. This essay will discuss both views before explaining why I believe that the competition is a good thing at the work place.
On the one hand, many people believe that competition is a good thing which helps them to win in their lives. Most people work hard at the workplace to get better incentives than the other employes. For example, in school, students participate in various activities which encourage them to try their best in competition and they can feel proud of them. As a result, from competition people learn various thing about their life and motivates them to achieve success in their life.
On the other hand, some people argue that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other because it strengthen relationship between people. Although, it cannot help people to achieve success, it may create good environment at work place and it reduces misunderstanding with others. For instance, many workplace do not organise competition at they believe cooperation is more benificial for people. As a result, people learn cooperation by working on specific work place which do not offer competition.
From my prespective, competition is essential for individuals life to achieve success in their life. It encourage workers to work harder and get promotion at higher postion in the workplace. In my view, cooperate is not a good thing to achieve goal. Hence, competition helps people to promote themselves at higher position,
In conclusion, although cooperation has its own value, I believe that competition has more advantages becuase it makes people life more creative and they can succeed from this.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both views on competition and cooperation and providing a clear personal opinion. The writer establishes a position in the introduction, stating that competition is beneficial, particularly at the workplace, and maintains this stance throughout the body paragraphs and conclusion. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and repetitive. For example, the support for the benefits of competition relies heavily on general statements like 'get better incentives' and 'achieve success in their life' rather than fully extended, specific examples. Similarly, the counterargument regarding cooperation is slightly under-developed. Despite these minor limitations in idea extension, the prompt is adequately answered and all required elements are covered.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The essay is coherent overall with a clear logical arrangement of paragraphs, including an introduction, two body paragraphs discussing opposing views, a personal perspective paragraph, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are used to signal transitions, such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', and 'In conclusion'. However, referencing and cohesion are sometimes faulty or mechanical. For instance, the transition 'Although, it cannot help people...' creates a fragmented sentence structure, and the pronoun referencing in sentences like 'it may create good environment... and it reduces misunderstanding' occasionally becomes repetitive. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct themes, but the flow between sentences could be smoother with more varied cohesive markers.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as 'incentives', 'perspective', and 'beneficial'. However, there are noticeable spelling and word choice errors throughout the text, including typos ('cometing' instead of competing, 'employes', 'benificial', 'prespective', 'becuase'), and awkward collocations like 'higher postion' and 'individuals life'. Some vocabulary is also repeated frequently, such as 'achieve success in their life'. While these lexical errors and limitations do not impede communication, they prevent the response from achieving a higher band score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, including conditional and concessive clauses such as 'Although, it cannot help people to achieve success...' and 'Some people believe that competition is a good thing which helps them...'. There are, however, frequent grammatical and punctuation errors. These include missing plural markers ('peoples' lives', 'various thing', 'many workplace'), missing articles ('at the work place', 'at workplace'), and incorrect preposition use. Additionally, there are punctuation errors such as comma splices ('Hence, competition helps people to promote themselves at higher position,'). Despite these frequent errors, the meaning remains mostly clear and communication is rarely impeded.
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