Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-28
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Nowadays, our university is filled with skilled and performed people and with porgression of some phenomenons such as technology , hard working ,soft skills and braindraining would sginificantly appears the competeion between the member of society .
Some humans see those competition may be an importent stuff for daily work or for sudents and childrens .however, the other criticize the idea of being competitive and think that cooperation and collaboration the one thing will lead to achieve the work's aim or students goals .
Personnaly ,either way are interested and important that we need to involve it in our society . For explanation, the idea of being competitive is an essential and significant if we put it in its apporpriate place example from my daily life im student and i'm always interested in mathematics subjects such as data analys , risk mesures and others includes mathematics calculations and i usully have good degrrees on it ,even though there ´s many competitors in my class they indirectly encourage me to stay always in process to develop my mental skills and practice more so then i can still as smart and as competent as they are . competetion in the final may lead people to progress and instill the desire to reach their goals even at work competitivity between colleage can stimulate skillful hardwoking staff and also the company achieves its aim of increasing benefits and entering international competitive markets thanks to the challenges between cowokers .
To conclude , competitivity is usully an important thing for our world if we know how to use it optimistically to achieve positive goals that can develop our abilities , performences and specially positive influence to our environement and society .
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response addresses both parts of the prompt, discussing the views that competition is beneficial and that cooperation should be prioritised, while also stating a personal opinion. However, the development of ideas is limited and somewhat repetitive. For instance, the discussion on competition in daily life focuses heavily on a personal example regarding mathematics subjects and data analysis, but it lacks broader societal exploration. The alternative view regarding cooperation is mentioned only briefly in the second paragraph without substantial extension or support. While a clear position is present, the arguments remain under-developed and tend to over-generalise. These limitations align closely with the Band 5 descriptors, as the task is addressed, but the depth and extension of ideas fall short of higher bands.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay displays some overall organisation, with a clear introduction, body paragraph, and conclusion, but it suffers from significant structural and mechanical issues. Paragraphing is attempted, yet the massive single body paragraph contains multiple disparate ideas that should be separated. Cohesive devices are frequently inadequate, inaccurate, or overused, such as 'For explanation,' and 'For example from my daily life im student'. Furthermore, referencing and logical progression are weak, with run-on sentences and a lack of clear transitional links between thoughts. These features reflect the characteristics of Band 5, where information is arranged with some organisation, but overall logical progression and cohesive management are lacking.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.0
The vocabulary used is limited and contains numerous severe errors in spelling, word formation, and word choice that impede communication. Examples include 'performed' instead of 'performant' or 'proficient', 'porgression', 'phenomenons', 'braindraining', 'sginificantly', 'competeion', 'apporpriate', and 'analys'. While the student attempts less common items such as 'competitivity', 'skillful hardwoking staff', and 'international competitive markets', the frequency of basic and non-standard lexical choices creates noticeable difficulty for the reader. The range is minimally adequate to convey basic concepts, but the density of spelling and morphological errors restricts the score to Band 4.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0
The response demonstrates a very limited range of structures, relying heavily on long, convoluted, run-on sentences joined by weak conjunctions or punctuation errors. There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including missing articles ('im student', 'in mathematics subjects'), incorrect verb forms ('either way are interested', 'that we need to involve it'), and punctuation lapses. Attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty, leading to distorted meanings and high difficulty for the reader to parse the exact relationships between clauses. Due to the high frequency of errors across basic and complex structures, the writing fits the Band 4 descriptor where errors are frequent and impede readability.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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