Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-29
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
Some people belive that competition at different stage of life is more effective while, other argued that there should a cooperate envirnoment.In my perspective coopration or team work is more benifical to our society
On one hand, those who support competition arugue that it help to develop self-motivation this is beacuse if we are in compitition we try to give our best to achieve our goal, Furthermore to point out those who are more capable for doing a specific task, for instance a company want a CEO what they will have interviews and choose the best person that fit the job position. In my opinion although compitition have advantages, those who can't compete they were become isolated in society.
On the other hand, proponent of cooperative envirnoment believe that this will help to develop a society in which people help eachothere so every individual has a proment status in society for example in order to complete a task both bright and average minds will work together in a team this will help to achive task properly. I think team work is key leads to a perfect society, all the members have equal right so ther will be no racism.
In conclution, Both perspectives have greate points but cooperative overwight the competitive. Althought I believe that should be competition in some job sectors, team work is what we require for our society.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response attempts to discuss both views on competition versus cooperation and states a clear personal opinion that cooperation is more beneficial. However, the word count falls short of the required minimum of 250 words, coming in at 231 words, which incurs a penalty on Task Achievement. While the main ideas are presented, they lack sufficient extension and development. For instance, the argument about companies hiring a CEO is abrupt and under-developed, and the point regarding racism under the cooperation paragraph lacks clear logical connection to the prompt. Consequently, the response addresses the task only partially, aligning with the criteria for Band 5.0.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay is divided into distinct paragraphs, including an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which shows an overall structural awareness. However, progression is frequently disrupted by poor sentence boundary punctuation, run-on sentences, and inadequate or inaccurate cohesive devices. For example, sentences such as 'Some people belive that competition at different stage of life is more effective while, other argued that there should a cooperate envirnoment.' demonstrate faulty cohesion and a lack of clear referencing. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion is mechanical and weak, placing the response firmly at Band 5.0.
Lexical Resource: Band 4.0
The vocabulary used is generally basic and repetitive, with numerous spelling and word choice errors throughout the text. Examples include 'belive' instead of believe, 'cooperate' instead of cooperative, 'benifical' instead of beneficial, 'arugue' instead of argue, 'compitition' instead of competition, 'proment' instead of prominent, and 'conclution' instead of conclusion. While the writer attempts some less common words like 'isolation' and 'proponent', the high frequency of spelling and morphological errors impedes understanding in places and restricts the score to Band 4.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.0
The text shows a very limited range of grammatical structures, consisting mostly of simple and attempted complex sentences that are heavily flawed. There are frequent, persistent errors in punctuation, subject-verb agreement, and clause structuring. For example, 'this is beacuse if we are in compitition we try to give our best to achieve our goal' runs multiple clauses together without proper punctuation. Another instance is 'those who can't compete they were become isolated', which exhibits severe structural inaccuracy. Because errors are frequent and constantly disrupt meaning, the performance reflects Band 4.0.
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