Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-29
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. In stark contrast others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. In my opinion good level of competition can achieve excellent result while high level of competitions feel people demotivate .
One the one hand, competition at work, at school and in daily life that feel to require more energy to compete. Many Employee give their full attention on work when compete with each other that make work efficiently, complete task in few times, moreover, that can good for job to promotions and future. However students who compete with each other they reach their full potential to study, study hours expanding, compete in tests, and achieve excellent results. For example, if we not compete with each other that make people unable to reach destination and they have not set their future goal in school, work and life.
On the other hand, some times competition make people demotivate and anxious. Students who have natural limits they can compete with high scholar students that they can feel student demotivate that affect on their results. However ,some people compete with their life with car, house and quality life that not subject to compete with each other. Moreover, Competition make some times dangerous results of sucide and other accidents. For example, many students in Kota students competitions which each other, some student who score poor result attempt sucide.
In conclusion, people can achieve good results by compete with each other yet high level competition that make people in danger. High level goals can make good achievement.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the benefits of competition and the drawbacks of it, concluding with the writer's own perspective. The position is generally clear, though the arguments are sometimes repetitive and lack deeper elaboration. For instance, the paragraph supporting competition mentions that employees work efficiently and students reach their potential, but the supporting points remain somewhat surface-level and broad. Similarly, the counter-argument regarding anxiety and extreme consequences like suicide is introduced with an example from Kota, but the ideas are not fully extended into a well-structured analytical argument. Overall, the ideas presented are relevant and address the prompt, placing this response at a Band 6.0.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The essay is divided into logical paragraphs with a clear introduction, body paragraphs presenting opposing views, and a brief conclusion. However, the progression of ideas is occasionally hindered by awkward transitions and mechanical cohesive devices, such as 'One the one hand' (which contains a typo) and repetitive sentence starters like 'However' and 'Moreover'. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the internal cohesion within paragraphs lacks seamless flow. Paragraphing is attempted appropriately to separate views, but overall management of cohesive relationships places this criterion at a Band 5.5.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, allowing the student to convey basic arguments about competition and cooperation. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary, such as 'demotivate', 'efficiently', and 'potential', but these are often accompanied by word-form errors, such as 'feel people demotivate' instead of 'make people feel demotivated', or 'compete with their life' instead of 'compete in life'. Spelling and word-choice errors occur frequently, such as 'sucide' and 'scholar students' instead of 'high-achieving students'. Because these errors occasionally strain comprehension, the lexical resource fits the Band 5.0 descriptor.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but control over grammar and punctuation is weak. There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the response, including missing articles ('reach destination', 'achieve excellent result'), incorrect prepositions ('compete with each other that make work efficiently'), and faulty subject-verb agreement or tense usage ('if we not compete', 'some times competition make'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with stray spacing and missing commas. Because these frequent errors cause difficulty for the reader and impede the clarity of complex thoughts, this corresponds to a Band 5.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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