Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-29
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Some individual's consider that competition at work, at school and in daily life good think. Others belived that we should try to cooperate more, rather than comparing against each other because they can get stress and disturb in their life.
One of the major reason is that, sometimes competition can make children more active and creative. While, student's have a lots of challage with each others. Moreover, in academic level kids have to face with severals problems however rivalry help them to be stong mind set. Such as, they can handel situation without any narvousness. At times it can be rushed to make decision. Although, age of under 18 younger be able to make their future brighter. sometimes Challage can change their habit and laziness.
Another reasion is that, in school is better by contrast in daily life it can be negative effect in their life. Eventhough, a lots of parents are doing strict and they force them to learn every day. For instance, they compare with other childs and they can be frustrate. They have a right to take their own decision so let them to enjoy their life. Furthermore, in weekend and free time let them to play games with their friends. Games can make their mind refresh maintaily and physically healthy.
In conclusion, both point of view are valid by contrast persionally i, consider that we should not force them too much.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response attempts to discuss both views regarding competition and cooperation and gives a personal opinion. However, there are several significant issues that limit the score. First, the response is under the required word count, containing only 235 words instead of the minimum 250, which attracts a penalty under Task Achievement. Furthermore, the ideas are often underdeveloped and difficult to follow due to unclear reasoning. For instance, the writer states that rivalry helps children to have a strong mindset, but the explanation jumps between various ideas such as decision-making, laziness, and age limits without proper expansion. The position is stated in the conclusion, but overall the development remains limited and repetitive, corresponding to a Band 5 level.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, which provides a basic visual structure, but the internal organization and progression of ideas are frequently faulty. While some cohesive devices are attempted, such as 'Moreover', 'Although', and 'Furthermore', they are often used inaccurately or inappropriately, creating disjointed transitions. For example, sentences like 'While, student's have a lots of challage with each others' disrupt the flow of information. Paragraphing is attempted, but the grouping of ideas is erratic; the second body paragraph mixes discussions on school environments with parental pressure and weekend games in a confusing manner. Referencing is also unclear at times, making it difficult to determine what pronouns or noun phrases refer to. Overall, the coherence and cohesion reflect a Band 5 performance.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, with noticeable errors that occasionally impede the reader's understanding. Examples of inaccurate word choices and spelling errors include 'individual's consider' instead of 'individuals consider', 'good think' instead of 'good thing', 'belived', 'challage', 'severals', 'handel', 'narvousness', 'reasion', and 'persionally'. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary such as 'creative', 'frustrate', and 'physically healthy', but these are undermined by frequent lexical and morphological errors. The range is limited and minimally adequate for conveying simple ideas, aligning closely with the Band 5 descriptors.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The essay demonstrates a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying heavily on simple sentences and flawed complex attempts. Errors in grammar and punctuation are frequent throughout the text. For instance, subject-verb agreement is frequently violated, as seen in 'student's have a lots of challage' and 'other childs'. Punctuation errors also distract the reader, such as inappropriate commas breaking up basic structures like 'persionally i, consider'. Complex structures are attempted with subordinating conjunctions like 'Although' and 'Eventhough', but these clauses are frequently incomplete or grammatically incorrect, such as 'Although, age of under 18 younger be able to make their future brighter.' These frequent errors cause difficulty for the reader and place the grammar at a Band 4.5, rounded to 5.0.
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