Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Few individuals think that competing with others in school, workplace and in our daily life is a postive thing. Many people incline towards saying that we should help out eachother instead of making it a competition. Competition can have negative impacts such as it affects badly on our mental heath. Sometimes competiton has a positive impact and it brings best ability out of a person. Personally, I do agree with the fact that healthy competiton should be necessary in all aspects of life.

Mental health is really important nowadays and it can be very tiring for some people to compete all the time. Every person has certain limitations and to expect them to excel in every part of their life is unfair, this burden of expectation makes it harder for them and it takes a toil on their mental health, in that case the emphasize should be on cooperating with each other and help those who need help instead of competing with them. For instance, the number of students doing suicides nowadays has increased in last 15 years, this because the students are expected to compete highly with eachother and at the end they get tired and affect themselves.

Some of the times healthy competion should be encouraged because it helps people realise what they are capable of. Competing with each other brings the best out of individuals which they dont realise they have it in them. For example, when I saw my colleague getting apprreciation and salary increament because he was working really hard I started competing with him and that helped me get promotion before him.

In conclusion, many people believe competiton should not be promoted because it destroys one's mental health, whereas some people think it should be encouraged because it helps people achieve more. I believe there should be a healthy competion in some aspects of life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the benefits of competition and the arguments for cooperation, while also stating a clear personal opinion. The ideas are relevant, such as mentioning the impact on mental health and personal motivation, though some points are slightly under-developed. For example, the claim about students committing suicide lacks broader academic context, and the supporting examples are a bit anecdotal. Nevertheless, a clear position is maintained throughout the essay. The response satisfies the requirements of Band 6 well, as it addresses all parts of the prompt with relevant ideas, even if the depth of extension varies across the paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction, body paragraphs addressing each view, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate ideas. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or repetitive, such as starting consecutive sentences with phrases like 'Mental health is really important' and 'Some of the times'. Referencing is generally clear, but the logical progression between sentences occasionally feels abrupt. The essay meets the criteria for Band 6 due to its overall logical structure and adequate, if sometimes mechanical, use of organizational features.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items such as 'limitation', 'excel', 'cooperating', and 'appreciation'. However, there are noticeable spelling and word choice inaccuracies, such as 'postive' instead of positive, 'heath' instead of health, 'competiton' instead of competition, 'emphasize' instead of emphasis, and 'increament' instead of increment. Collocations are occasionally awkward, such as 'takes a toil' instead of 'takes a toll'. These errors do not impede communication, placing the vocabulary firmly in the Band 6 category.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The writer employs a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some ability to form subordinate clauses, as seen in 'when I saw my colleague getting appreciation... I started competing with him'. However, there are several grammatical errors and punctuation slips throughout the text, including comma splices and run-on sentences, such as 'Every person has certain limitations and to expect them to excel in every part of their life is unfair, this burden...'. There are also article and preposition errors. While these errors occur frequently, they rarely impede overall communication, which aligns well with the descriptors for Band 6.

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