Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-01
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In recet years, the expenditure elevate drastically due to which everyone wants to earn more which influence people to compete with each other for better life. However, some people argue that competition is beneficial for us, while some individuals consider it as a problematical for other people. In my opinion although it is not necessary for us, this competition make people to do hardwork to achieve their goals so, it benefit public.
On the one hand, the competition is essential for everone to put some effort in their work. Primarily, a healthy competition is the crucial point of our life where learn that with grinding and patience they are eligible for success. To be more percise, the people not do any thing if they got success without anything which negatively impact you economy and their own lifes too. To exemplify, in many countries that jobs are given basically on their level and what they are able to give them such as big company and arthorities also do this.
On the other hand, some the competition destory some people life also who are unable to compete with other and lose their motivation and moral. To expalin, the people who have not enough will power are unable to standout in this society which is depressing and sad for many people. For instance, in many countries the people usually people are so demotivate in that condition and sometime in worst case people suicide,
To conclude, although, the competition is wrong in some case but this is key point that make us human and able to standout in this society, not only this it is also effective for our society and for individuals also so, it is necessary for us to have a healthy comepetition in our life to show you prime side to this world.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses the task only partially, presenting both views on competition and cooperation while attempting to provide a personal opinion. However, the position is not always clear, and the ideas remain limited and under-developed. For instance, the introduction states that competition makes people work hard to achieve their goals, but this point is not fully extended with concrete examples. In the body paragraphs, the reasoning behind how competition benefits the economy or why it destroys lives lacks depth, relying on vague generalisations such as "people not do any thing if they got success without anything." While the main components of the prompt are touched upon, the lack of thorough explanation and fully supported arguments keeps the response at this level.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The essay displays some organisation with basic paragraphing and general attempts to structure the arguments, but there is no clear overall progression. Paragraphs are divided into an introduction, two body paragraphs representing opposing views, and a conclusion, which establishes a basic framework. However, the logical flow between sentences is frequently disrupted due to inadequate and inaccurate cohesive devices. For example, transitional phrases like "To be more percise" and "To expalin" are misused, and referencing is often unclear, such as pronoun shifts between "you" and "they" within the same context. Additionally, repetition of phrasing across paragraphs prevents the essay from achieving a smooth and logical progression of ideas throughout.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is limited but minimally adequate to convey the general topic of workplace and lifestyle competition. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary, such as "expenditure," "grinding," and "standout," but these are accompanied by noticeable errors in word choice, form, and spelling that occasionally cause difficulty for the reader. For instance, terms like "recet" instead of recent, "problematical" instead of problematic, and "demotivate" instead of demotivated demonstrate persistent lexical inaccuracies. Furthermore, collocations are frequently unnatural, as seen in expressions like "worst case people suicide," showing that the range of vocabulary remains restricted and needs greater precision to elevate the response.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response demonstrates a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying primarily on simple sentences alongside poorly controlled complex forms. There are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that often cause difficulty and strain for the reader. Issues include frequent subject-verb agreement errors, such as "this competition make people" and "the competition destory," alongside incorrect verb tenses and forms like "the people not do any thing." Prepositions within grammatical patterns are also misused, and awkward phrasing limits the variety of structures. The high frequency of errors across basic sentence patterns prevents the text from achieving better clarity and control.
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