Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-02
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
IT IS OFTEN ARGUE THAT SOME INDIVIDUALS DEBATE THAT COMPETITION AT WORK, AT SCHOOL AND IN DAILY ROUTING IS A PROMINENT ASPECT. WHILST OTHER BELIEVE THAT PEOPLE SHOULD TRY TO COOPERATE MORE, RATHER THAN INTERNAL COMPETITION. THIS ESSAY WILL DISCUSS BOTH VIEWPOINT ABOUT THAT AGREEMENT ALONG WITH EXAMPLES.
ON THE ONE HAND, MANY PEOPLE THINK THAT COMPETITION AT WORK AND DURING THE STUDY-TIME HELPS TO ENHANCE PERSONAL SKILLS. TO BE MORE SPECIFIC, HEALTHY AND BENEFICIAL COMPETITION IMPROVE INDIVIDUALS PSYCHOLOGICAL AND PHYSICAL STRENGTH. PEOPLE SIGNIFICANTLY ELEVATE THIER PROBLEM-SOLVING SKILLS, SELF CONFIDENCE AS WELL AS MAKE EFFORTS TO BE EXPERT IN FIELD. ADDITIONALLY, COMPETITION BOOST INDIVIDUALS PRODUCTIVITY AND INDEPENDANT REGARDING PROFESSIONAL CAREER. CONSEQUENTLY, COMEPTITIVE ENVIRONMENT BENEFICIAL FOR INDIVIDUAL AND SOCIETY, BECAUSE PEOPLE REDUCE OBLIGATION FOR THEMSELVES. AS A RESULT PEOPLE BECAME UPRIGHT PERSON. TO EXEMPLIFY, STUDENTS, WHO WIN THE TOURNAMENTS AND QUIZ DURING THEIR STUDY MAY RECIEVE BETTER FUTURE OPPORTUNITIES AND IN THE OFFICE-LIFE, PERSON WHO EXPERT IN MUTIPLE FIELD AMONG OTHER OFFICERS ACHIVE SIGNIFICANT PROGRESS IN THEIR CAREER.
ON THE OTHER HAND, OTHER ARGUE THAT COOPERATION IS MORE REWARDING AND IMPORTANT FOR A SOCIETY TO GATHER WITH INDIVIDUALS PERSONAL GROWTH. IN OTHER WORDS, COOPERATION AND HELPING NATURE IMPROVE SOCIAL SKILLS, WHICH ARE CRUCIAL THING TO MAKE IDEAL SOCIETY. FURTHERMORE, MUTUAL SUPPORT PROFITABLE BECAUSE IMPROVE COMMUNICATION SKILLS, LEADERSHIP AND TEAMWORK ABILITY. SPORTS SUCH AS CRICKET AND FOOTBALL AND MULTINATION BUSINESSES SUCH AS CARGO AND FINANCE INDUSTRY NEEDS COOPERATION BETWEEN EACH OTHER TO ACHIVE BETTER RESULT. MOREOVER, TEAMWORK PROVID SOLUTION OF ANY ISSUES IN SHORT TIME PERIOD HAND ON HAND.
IN CONLUSION, IN THIS CONTEMPORARY ERA, COMPETITION IS GOOD AND BENEFITICAL FOR INDIVIDUALS. HOWEVER, COOPERATION AND TEAMWORK ENHANCE PERSONAL AND SOCIAL PRODUCTIVITY. HENCE, IN MY OPINION, PEOPLE MAY TRY TO MAKE BALANCE BETWEEN COMPETITION AND COOPERATION FOR EFFECTIVE RESULT.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both the benefits of competition and the importance of cooperation, while also presenting a clear overall opinion in the conclusion. However, the development of ideas is uneven. For instance, the arguments regarding how competition enhances personal skills and physical strength are somewhat repetitive and under-developed, relying on general assertions rather than thorough elaboration. Similarly, the examples provided, such as students winning tournaments and office workers achieving progress, are stated briefly without sufficient extension to fully support the points. To reach a higher level, the ideas need to be more fully explored, with more specific and detailed examples that directly strengthen the core arguments throughout every body paragraph.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The essay demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a clear, logical progression of ideas from the introduction through the body paragraphs to the final conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately, with distinct sections for the introduction, the two contrasting views, and the summary statement. Cohesive devices such as 'ON THE ONE HAND', 'ON THE OTHER HAND', 'TO EXEMPLIFY', and 'IN CONLUSION' are employed to guide the reader through the structure of the argument, though some referencing and transitions can feel slightly mechanical or formulaic. The response successfully incorporates the partial characteristics of higher band scores by maintaining an evident logical flow, but to achieve a higher score, the integration of cohesive links needs to feel more natural and fluid rather than relying on standard transitional markers.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common items such as 'PROMINENT ASPECT', 'PSYCHOLOGICAL AND PHYSICAL STRENGTH', and 'CONTEMPORARY ERA'. However, there are noticeable lexical errors in word choice, word form, and spelling that occasionally impede communication. Examples of these inaccuracies include the opening phrase 'IT IS OFTEN ARGUE', 'DAILY ROUTING' instead of routine, 'INTERNAL COMPETITION' where interpersonal might be intended, 'INDEPENDANT', 'COMEPTITIVE', 'RECIEVE', 'MUTIPLE', 'ACHIVE', 'PROVID' for provide, and 'CONLUSION'. These errors demonstrate a limited control over spelling and word formation, which restricts the lexical score to this level. To improve, the writer needs to expand their precision in word choice and carefully proofread to eliminate basic spelling and morphological mistakes.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures like conditional and relative clauses, as seen in 'students, who win the tournaments and quiz during their study may recieve better future opportunities'. However, there are frequent errors in grammar and punctuation, particularly involving subject-verb agreement, articles, and missing auxiliary verbs. Examples include 'WHILST OTHER BELIEVE' instead of others, 'COMPETITION BOOST' instead of boosts, 'ENVIRONMENT BENEFICIAL' missing a verb, 'PERSON WHO EXPERT' missing a verb, and 'PEOPLE MAY TRY TO MAKE BALANCE' omitting articles. While these errors rarely completely obscure the overall meaning, their frequency indicates that control over complex structures is still developing. To progress, the student must work on sentence construction accuracy, ensuring proper verb forms, articles, and agreement across all clauses.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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