Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Some people think that contest at work, at school and in a daily life is a good thing. Other Consider that we should try to work together, instead of contest against each other.

Firstly, I completly agree with work together rather than competing because if we work lonly and race with each other our socity will be never successed and some one fall down and on the other hand if we collaborate with each other we will be successed.

For instance, my friend work in our house and as a same time I am also build a house and my friend need some money and I refused his request his housed stay in the middle while I have more many acording to my houser and I am not givin to him thin our friendship will be end and we will not support each other. If I give him money and he was conpleted his house they remember my kindness and sympithy.

Secondly, contest with each other are putin a major impact on our socity mainly on students. For example, there are two child in same class and one kid take more marks from the other one and the father of the ancher kid which whose take less marks from

The other one say him your are loser and you have no abality to compeit with other. However, juveniles take these words in our heart and these words make him heart and the miner will be not try are competing with the other but also he is thinking about himself that I am loser and I cant do it.

In my point of view cooprate with each other is a great thing and we need to do some pratices on these oike things and our youth will learn from these lessons.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both views on competition and cooperation and stating an opinion, which is a necessary step for this band level. However, the development of ideas remains limited and under-developed. For example, the discussion regarding competition in schools relies on a single, convoluted example about a child being called a loser by a father, without exploring the broader societal or educational implications required to fully answer the task. Furthermore, the personal example regarding building houses lacks clarity and wanders into specific anecdotes that obscure the main argument. To move to a higher band, the writer needs to present fully extended and well-supported arguments that thoroughly explore both sides of the prompt rather than relying on brief, simplistic illustrations.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The essay displays some overall organization with basic sequencing markers such as 'Firstly' and 'Secondly', but there is a lack of clear overall progression. Paragraphing is attempted, but the body paragraphs contain multiple disparate ideas and run-on sentences that blur the logical flow. Cohesive devices are often inadequate or repetitive, with excessive reliance on basic conjunctions like 'and' and 'because' rather than a variety of linking words. For instance, the transition between sentences in the discussion about friendship and house building is abrupt and difficult to follow. To achieve a higher score, the writer must ensure that each paragraph has a clear central topic, ideas are logically sequenced with appropriate cohesive devices, and referencing between sentences is clear and unambiguous.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is limited and minimally adequate for the task. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'collaborate' and 'sympithy', but these are accompanied by noticeable errors in word choice, word form, and spelling. For instance, terms like 'contest' are used instead of 'competition', 'completly' contains a spelling error, and phrases like 'take more marks' demonstrate non-standard collocations. These lexical inadequacies and frequent spelling mistakes cause some difficulty for the reader. To improve, the writer needs to expand their range of vocabulary, pay closer attention to word forms and collocations, and work on accurate spelling for common academic terms.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The writing reveals a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying heavily on simple sentences joined by coordinating conjunctions. When the writer attempts complex sentences, they are frequently faulty, exhibiting severe issues with subject-verb agreement, tense consistency, and clause structures. Examples include 'if we work lonly and race with each other our socity will be never successed' and 'the father of the ancher kid which whose take less marks... say him your are loser'. Frequent errors in articles, prepositions, and punctuation are present throughout the text and often cause difficulty for the reader. To progress to a higher band, the writer must demonstrate better control over basic sentence construction, reduce the frequency of grammatical errors, and successfully incorporate a wider variety of accurate complex structures.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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