Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-05
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In my opinion competition is quite interesting fact that motivate individuals to reach preferable goals in academics and professional settings. When people have someone to compete with, it pushes them towards the goals. For instance getting a better job would be the main goal of most individuals. But requirements are crucial to meet. In order to get a desireable job or promotion we have to compete with other employees even though everyone doesn't intend to.
During school period students are provided with medals and certificates by organising an award ceremony. It could motivate the students to study and achieve the potential outcomes. There can be only one 'top performer' in every class and he/she gets the appriciation. So, other students also hope to compete with them and reach the peak.
The competition in daily lives also can enhance individuals' self-esteem and personality. Competing gives energy to put forward in order to achieve goals and complete tasks.
In other hand it has negative consequences also. Considering cultural and social aspects. competition among same community or group of people could view as immorality by others. By competing we might lose a friend who we spend our valuable time and shared our experiences. When we lose it would be anxious and guilt that effect mentally.
Overall competition has positive and negative effects according to its necessity and result. even though people compete with others to demonstrate their ability in academics and professions, they should be aware of social responsibilities of safeguarding their autonomy and maintain their's relationship beyond the targeted goals. The competition should be into a specific area where they want to prove themselves.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
The response addresses the task only partially. While it touches upon both views—competition in work and school, and the negative consequences such as social friction—the position is not always clearly sustained throughout the essay. Ideas are somewhat limited and under-developed, particularly when discussing daily life, where the argument lacks specific elaboration. For instance, the point that competition enhances self-esteem is stated rather than extended or supported with a robust example. To reach a higher level, the writer would need to ensure that both views are explored more fully and that all main ideas are supported by clear, detailed explanations and relevant examples.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
There is some organisation in the essay, as the paragraphs generally group related ideas together, such as school achievements or negative social consequences. However, there is no clear overall progression throughout the text. Cohesive devices are sometimes inadequate or used mechanically, for example, starting a paragraph with 'In other hand' instead of 'On the other hand'. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, such as the pronoun use in 'When we lose it would be anxious and guilt that effect mentally.' Paragraphing is attempted, but transitions between the distinct views and the personal opinion lack smoothness. To improve, the writer needs to employ a wider and more accurate range of cohesive devices to guide the reader logically from one point to the next.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The vocabulary used provides a minimally adequate range for the task, but it is limited. There are noticeable lexical errors and issues with word choice, word form, and collocation that may occasionally cause some difficulty for the reader. For instance, phrases like 'interesting fact that motivate' contain incorrect word forms ('motivate' instead of 'motivates'), and 'desireable' is misspelled. Other awkward collocations include 'effect mentally' instead of 'affect mentally' or 'mental effects'. The writer attempts some less common vocabulary such as 'autonomy' and 'self-esteem', but inaccuracies prevent higher achievement. Expanding the range of vocabulary and ensuring correct word forms will help elevate this aspect of the writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The response displays a limited range of sentence structures. While there are some attempts at complex sentences, they are often faulty, featuring frequent errors in grammar and punctuation that can cause difficulty for the reader. Examples of structural and agreement errors include 'competition in daily lives also can enhance', missing articles in 'During school period', and incorrect prepositions or verb patterns such as 'The competition should be into a specific area'. Punctuation is also weak in places, particularly with run-on phrasing and possessive forms like 'maintain their's relationship'. To progress, the writer should focus on mastering basic sentence structures, improving subject-verb agreement, and reducing the frequency of grammatical errors in complex forms.
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