Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-06
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In this society, a section of people believes that competing in workplace and school is a healthy practice. However, another domain argues that instead of keeping such a competitive mind, people should have to maintain a harmonious cooperation and understanding. I would argue that, the individuals have to build a healthy relationship through cooperation and community living.
It is the innante nature of human beings to compete each other. Surprinsingly, nowadays it is prevalent among human beings to compete each other regardless of love, respect, position and money. The main motivation behind this is greediness. Furthermore, ego and inferority complex in the individuals contribute in competing precariously with others. Moreover, the challenging issue is that this nature of people affects physical and mental health. For example, a recent survey conducted among the students by the pyschology department of my college clarifies that, competition among the students create mental pressure which affe ts the mental and physical wellbeing of the students
In sharp contrast, another section in the society always supports harmony and cooperation among the people. A good reason is that, as a social being, every people should have to live in coperation. It will help to build exceptionaly peaceful society. In addition to that, such a society provides calmess and mindfullness to the citizens.From my personal experience, when I stopped the detrimental thought of competing with others provided a plethora of impacts in my life. As a result of this, happiness and calmness in my mind tremendously developed.
In conclusion, argubly it is better to live with love and cooperation with others. Unwanted competition with others is a demanding issue which is to be stopped through providing proper awarness to the people.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the view that competition is beneficial and the view that cooperation should be prioritized, while also providing a clear personal opinion in the introduction and conclusion. However, the development of ideas is uneven. While the second body paragraph presents a relevant point about the mental health impacts of competition and supports it with an example of a college survey, the exploration of cooperation in the third body paragraph tends to generalize rather than fully extending the arguments with concrete examples. To reach a higher level, the ideas need to be more thoroughly developed and supported throughout all body paragraphs.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a clear organizational structure, divided logically into an introduction, two body paragraphs representing opposing views, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct themes. Nevertheless, cohesion within and between sentences is sometimes mechanical or faulty. For instance, transitional phrases such as 'In sharp contrast' are utilized, but referencing and logical flow occasionally falter, such as the abrupt transition in the final paragraph. To improve further, the writer should ensure that cohesive devices connect ideas more smoothly without drawing attention to themselves.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
The writer demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common items such as 'detrimental thought', 'plethora of impacts', and 'harmonious cooperation'. However, there are noticeable lexical errors and spelling mistakes throughout the text, including 'innante' instead of innate, 'Surprinsingly', 'inferority', 'precariously', 'coperation', 'calmess', 'mindfullness', and 'argubly'. While these errors do not severely impede communication, they reflect a lack of precision in word choice and spelling that prevents the response from achieving a higher mark.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at varied structures such as conditional and subordinate clauses. There are, however, several grammatical errors and punctuation lapses present. Examples include article and preposition usage issues like 'in workplace and school' instead of 'in the workplace and at school', subject-verb agreement issues such as 'every people should have to live', and typographical errors like 'affe ts'. Although these errors are noticeable, they rarely impede communication, allowing the reader to follow the intended message without major difficulty.
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