Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

i strongly believe competation at work or at school makes us work better,aim better ..with every win ,we gain confidence to achieve greater goals and so on.even if a competition is lose,its a stepping stone for people with strong mentality.while competition in every field is different.If its at schools ,be it in academics,cultural activities,sports or arts..competition is healthy .it makes people physically strong,confident speakers and may also produce future dancers , performers .active participation make us realise what things we are good at and may shine in our talents and may also persue career if we are best in our performances .i could give an example of myself where i was struggling to lose weight ,my everyday target was to burn 150 calories.. with time, i competed myself with my previous targets and this has made my weightloss journey successful. while the competitions are little different at work place where an employee needs to meet targets before deadline and might have to be giving best presentation and sometimes at work,the competitor is we ourself in trying to be better than previous projects.without competative spirit in us, life is stagnant and kind of repetitive.. to keep up the high spirits, we need to aim in life n keep competing to reach goals while in daily activities, i dont think we should compete to anyone but ourself..although competitionkeep us moving, there are certain things one needs to keep in mind .firstly,protect our sanity which is most impotant since it could easily lead to strong emotions like jealousy.secondly, competing shouldnt damage social fabric nor create hatred in society..

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You give a clear preference for competition, especially in the opening and in the conclusion that people should compete with themselves rather than others. Relevant examples include school activities, workplace targets, and your personal weight-loss goal. However, the task asks you to discuss both competition and cooperation, and cooperation receives almost no direct discussion. The final warning that competition should not damage social relationships hints at this view but does not explain its benefits or give a developed example. Several claims about competition, such as making people physically strong or producing performers, are asserted rather than fully explained. To strengthen the response, present the cooperation perspective explicitly, then compare it with your own view and support each main point with clearer reasoning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response contains a recognisable line of thought: it moves from competition in education to personal experience, then work and daily life, before ending with cautions. This gives the reader some sense of progression. However, nearly all the ideas are placed in one long paragraph, so the shifts between settings and the final qualifications are difficult to follow. Linking expressions such as “while,” “even if,” and “firstly” are used, but some connections are unclear or repetitive, and the conclusion is not clearly separated from the supporting discussion. Organise the essay into distinct paragraphs for the introduction, each viewpoint, and your conclusion. Use transitions that show whether you are adding a reason, contrasting views, or giving an example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “confidence,” “targets,” “participation,” “jealousy,” and “social fabric.” These choices help communicate your main ideas, and phrases such as “stepping stone” show an attempt to use more expressive language. However, spelling and word-choice errors are frequent enough to distract, including “competation,” “persue,” “weightloss,” and “competative.” Some expressions are also awkward or imprecise, such as “competed myself with my previous targets” and “the competitor is we ourself.” Aim for accurate spelling and more natural collocations, and avoid repeating “competition” when a more precise term such as “rivalry” or “personal challenge” would fit. Proofreading would improve clarity.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt to connect ideas in longer sentences, for example when explaining how school competitions may reveal talents and influence career choices. This shows some willingness to use complex structures. However, many sentences are run together, and punctuation and sentence boundaries are often missing, making relationships between clauses hard to follow. There are also recurring errors in agreement and sentence construction, as in “active participation make us realise” and “the competitor is we ourself.” Capitalisation and apostrophes are inconsistent, and some clauses lack a clear grammatical structure. Practise writing shorter, complete sentences first, then combine them with accurate conjunctions and relative clauses. Careful editing for subject–verb agreement and punctuation will make your meaning easier to follow.

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