Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Group of people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other. there are multiple aspects of competition we have seen in our life I support healthy competition makes you Stronger.

As we know we are living in today's world having multiple competitions have been seen in every sort of Organisation. However School competitions set a trade mark of your personality either you're cooperative with others or not. Although Nowadays many schools are just making money their preferences not to produce such students who Handle every situation meaningful. On the other hand such school are providing exceptional knowledge towards students. How to handle situations ? or by giving skill base training Either they are helpful to other candidates.

Additionally, People at work nowadays are not such cooperative with other peoples are just running in a race success. Employer should take some responsibility to make everyone in an organisation feel free to discuss everything they are facing in sort of conference may be with some colleagues. these types of sessions make good competition between them no one is doing back bash to others which makes everyone towards successfully reaching their goals. Healthy competition is much more impactful rather than bad competition by doing harsh to someone or many others things to be done

I believe, Competition is very important factor for becoming successful for your goal of achievement.

People from the communities proves seminars to people which will help them in future . However everyone has the responsibility to make their self more beneficial for the society by doing helping to others .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You state a position—“I support healthy competition”—and refer to both competition and cooperation, so the response is relevant to the topic. However, the discussion of the two views is only partial: the benefits of competition are suggested, but the opposing case for cooperation is not clearly explained or compared. Several points, such as schools “making money” and employers holding conferences, are difficult to connect to the question or are left without explanation. The conclusion repeats that competition matters but does not clearly resolve how cooperation should be balanced with it. To strengthen the response, explain one benefit of each approach, support each with a specific example, and make your opinion consistent throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is an attempt to organise the response into paragraphs and to guide the reader with phrases such as “On the other hand,” “Additionally,” and “I believe.” These signals show an awareness of how to connect ideas. However, the progression is difficult to follow because several sentences contain loosely connected points, and the relationship between competition and cooperation is not made clear. For example, the discussion moves from school priorities to training and then to whether students help others without explaining the links. The final paragraph introduces community seminars abruptly. Use one paragraph for each view, keep each paragraph focused on a main point, and use clear references and transitions to show how examples support that point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-related vocabulary, including “competition,” “cooperative,” “organisation,” “colleagues,” and “goals,” and phrases such as “healthy competition” show an attempt to express a distinction between constructive and harmful rivalry. However, the range is limited and several word choices or combinations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the meaning hard to understand. For instance, “set a trade mark of your personality” and “running in a race success” do not express the intended ideas naturally; “back bash” is also unclear in this context. Aim for precise, familiar collocations rather than assembling phrases word by word. Useful alternatives include “shape a student’s character,” “compete to succeed,” and “criticise colleagues behind their backs.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt some longer sentences and use subordinate clauses, for example, “Although Nowadays many schools…” and “which makes everyone…,” showing an effort to go beyond simple sentence patterns. However, sentence boundaries and clause construction are often inaccurate, and errors can obscure the intended meaning. The opening shifts into a sentence beginning with lowercase “there,” while “Employer should take some responsibility” lacks a clear plural or article choice, and “People from the communities proves” has subject–verb disagreement. Questions and fragments such as “How to handle situations?” are also not integrated into the sentence. Practise building complete sentences with one clear main clause, then check agreement, articles, and punctuation.

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