Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Many people tend to believe that the competition is well dealing at educational institutes, work places, and in daily life. While others are contradict with this statement and argue with that individuals must try to cooperate rather than that competing with others. As far as my opinion on this statement, I dicuss both parts of this essay and will mention at the end.

In the one hand, many individuals are doing jobs in various places or organizations. They try to perform well and showing these results to boss for their carrier. For example, the yearly bounace and insentive relay onlu on the performance throughout the year. Moreover, people want to compete with other colleauges for enhace their skills regarding jobs. Currenlty, the thechnology effects on skills-set in every field and individuals are try to boost in skills to got more job oppertunities. In this regards, many people try to compete with others for the improvement of skills and rank in the company.

On the other hand, competition badly effect on performance of the students. Nomerous students try to compete with other class fellows. When they performed well and got high rank in the class. Low position holders are frustrated and feel badly. Many of them are drastically reduce the class performance in future. In this regard, drawbacks of competition are badly effect on mental heatlh.

In conclusion, competition is better way to improvements of skills and performance in educational institutes, work places, and in daily activities. In contrast, It effect on mental health of people. I believe that the competition positive aspects are overweigh than negative aspects and I agree with competition must be held in every part of life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both perspectives: the workplace paragraph explains how competition may encourage employees to improve skills and performance, while the student paragraph describes frustration and possible harm to mental health. Your conclusion also gives a preference for competition. However, the position is not clear in the introduction, where you say you will give your opinion “at the end,” and the discussion of cooperation is limited: its benefits are not explained, so the two views are not explored evenly. Several claims, such as competition improving skills or reducing students’ future performance, need clearer explanation or a specific example. State your view directly from the beginning and develop both sides with reasons and relevant examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. Transitions such as “On the other hand” and “In conclusion” help readers follow the broad direction. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow: the workplace paragraph moves from bonuses to technology and job opportunities without clearly connecting each point, and the student paragraph’s sequence from high ranks to lower performers’ reactions is unclear. Some linking phrases are also mechanical or imprecise, including “In this regards.” Build each paragraph around one main idea, explain it step by step, and use pronouns and transitions that make the relationships between claims explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “performance,” “incentive,” “colleagues,” “opportunities,” and “mental health.” This gives you some useful topic coverage, but the range is limited and many spelling, word-form, and collocation errors make the writing less clear. Examples include “carrier” for “career,” “bounace,” “insentive,” and “enhace”; phrases such as “competition is well dealing” and “competition badly effect” are also unnatural. Aim to learn common word partnerships and check spelling and word forms carefully. More precise expressions such as “career progression,” “financial rewards,” and “damage students’ wellbeing” would help you express your ideas more naturally.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You use some longer sentence forms, including a contrast in the opening sentence and clauses beginning with “When” and “In this regard.” However, attempts at complex structures are often faulty, and errors in basic sentence construction can make meaning difficult to follow. For example, “While others are contradict with this statement” is not a complete, correctly formed clause, and “When they performed well and got high rank in the class” is left without a main clause. There are also recurring problems with verb forms and agreement, as in “individuals are try” and “competition badly effect.” Practise complete sentences, subject–verb agreement, and consistent verb forms before adding more complex clauses.

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