Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people argue that, competing is beneficial for our daily life, at school or even at work. Others believe that people should be more coordinated rather than competing with each other. I believe it can be beneficial for pupils to compete in classrooms or the playground. It can highlight their ability to work, and people in work can lead to promotions and high salary packages. However, cooperation is key for leadership in both school and work.

It has been important for schools to do final assessments. This can lead to final results for students by competing with each other proving at what level they are. Therefore, it is the best way for teachers to conduct exams. However, at the playground students are participating in sports to outperform other students, this shows the ability of young students how well they did in games. For instance, in Pakistan there are numerous schools who organize a sports championship in their area which fascinates students to take part in it and prove how well they can play by competing with others.

Furthermore, at work employees try to overcome their ability by competing in doing better at their assigned job, this leads to promotion and higher salary packages.While competitions are better to perform well from others, cooperation can enhance ones' ability of being calm. Therefore, many individuals avoid competing with others. Doing a lot of competition can lead to excess work and practice along with that can be reason for fights and disagreements. For instance, many individuals can argue regarding what to add in their presentation in office in hop of performing better to achieve promotions. Hence, many people avoid and try to be more coordinated towards their work.

In my view, competition is vital in schools, and sports for children to show their ability of performing better in both exams and sports. Additionally, this can motivate many students to study hard for getting better scores from others. On the other hand, coordination is key to success, many organizations avoid competitions among their employees due to discrimination and I agree with this idea because if you want to get promoted you achieve by showing your ability without competing.

To conclude, I believe coordination is vital and it helps many individuals to perform well and be a good leader. However, competitions are beneficial to motivate students to study hard.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You discuss both competition and cooperation and give a personal view, particularly in the final paragraph, where you support competition for students but favour cooperation in organisations. Relevant examples include school sports championships and disagreements over office presentations. However, the position is not fully consistent: the opening says competition can benefit workers through promotion, while later you agree that employees should not compete to gain promotion. The discussion also relies on broad claims, and some points—such as how cooperation develops leadership—are introduced but not explained. To strengthen the response, state a clear, balanced position in the introduction and develop each main reason with a specific explanation or example, especially the benefits of cooperation.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has an overall structure, with an introduction, discussion of school and workplace examples, a personal view, and a conclusion. Paragraphing helps separate these stages, and linking expressions such as “Furthermore,” “For instance,” and “To conclude” guide the reader. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow: the workplace paragraph moves from competition to cooperation and then to conflict without clearly signalling how these ideas relate. Some transitions, including “Therefore” and “Hence,” are used where the logical connection is not fully established, and the conclusion repeats the general contrast rather than resolving the mixed position. Organise each body paragraph around one central claim, then explain and illustrate it before moving to the opposing view.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “outperform,” “promotions,” “discrimination,” and “cooperation,” and the meaning is generally understandable. There are also attempts at less common phrasing, such as “salary packages” and “sports championship.” However, several word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, which makes some ideas less clear: “overcome their ability” does not express the intended meaning, and “in hop of performing better” is unclear. “Coordinated” is also repeated where “cooperate” or “work collaboratively” would be more natural. Aim for precise, conventional collocations and check word forms; for example, describe employees as “improving their performance” rather than “overcoming their ability.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, using clauses with “while,” “because,” and “which,” and most of the main ideas can be understood. However, complex sentences are often not controlled accurately. For example, “This can lead to final results for students by competing with each other proving at what level they are” has an unclear structure, while “coordination is key to success, many organizations avoid competitions” joins two independent clauses with only a comma. There are also errors in articles, agreement, and possessives, as in “ones' ability” and “in hop of.” Review sentence boundaries and build longer sentences around a clear subject and verb. More accurate control of these patterns would make your reasoning easier to follow.

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