Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-15

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Several individuals believe that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a great deal, while others argue that we have to try to cooperate with eachother rather than competing. In this essay, Iwill discuss both views and write my own opinion.

On the one hand, the moderate amount of people believe that competing with others at school, at work and in daily life is a great thing. It is because of peoples nature, such as some individuals do better work under pressure. For an instance,at work companies like Microsoft; their employees have much pressure to compete with each other and their employees took presure seriously and they do work on time; because of the fast growing fields of AI. If they don't do that competition with eachother then the company might fire them and hire new employees.

On the other hand, majority of individuals think that cooperating is better than competing. It is great for the society because people don't get jealous of eachothers and don't take a pressure of getting a first position.For example, countries like Germany or Italy they don't pressurize childrens for an exam till middle school, because they think that it's their teenage and in this age pupils ability for thinking must be triggered with the pressure of competition. As a result, People don't burdened theirselves and walk with the flow of their lives.

In my opinion, I strongly agree with the cooperating argument because it's good for the society, However people don't get jealous with their competitors.

In conclusion, both of the arguments are true according to the peoples behaviour. some persons do better in pressure and majority of peoples like to cooperate with others.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both sides of the question and state a preference for cooperation, so the response is relevant to the task. The Microsoft example gives some support for competition, while the Germany and Italy example is intended to illustrate cooperation. However, the discussion is only partly developed: the workplace example focuses on pressure and possible dismissal, without explaining more broadly how competition benefits people, and the country example makes a broad claim without showing how cooperation works in everyday life. Your opinion is also brief and slightly unclear: “I strongly agree with the cooperating argument” is followed by a point about not being jealous, which needs fuller explanation. Develop each main reason and connect examples more directly to it.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, your opinion, and a conclusion. “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” help signal the contrast, and the reader can generally follow the main points. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes difficult to follow because several claims are joined without clear relationships. For example, the Microsoft paragraph moves from pressure to timely work and then to the possibility of being fired. The conclusion largely repeats the two positions rather than drawing the discussion together, and the opinion paragraph is disconnected from the preceding explanation. Use clearer links between reason, example, and result, and make the conclusion reinforce your stated position.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “competing,” “cooperating,” “pressure,” and “jealous,” and the meaning is usually recoverable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations sound unnatural, which makes parts of the response less clear. For instance, “a great deal” does not express the intended positive judgement, “a moderate amount of people” is an awkward way to describe supporters, and “triggered with the pressure” is unclear. Spelling and word-form errors such as “eachother,” “presure,” and “childrens” also reduce accuracy. Build a more precise set of topic phrases and check spelling and collocations when editing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some longer sentences and use basic linking clauses, but the range of sentence structures is limited and errors occur frequently. These include missing or incorrect verb forms, as in “people don't burdened theirselves,” and agreement or sentence-pattern problems in “countries like Germany or Italy they don't pressurize childrens.” There are also errors with articles, plurals, and punctuation, such as “a first position” and the comma splice in “In my opinion, I strongly agree …, However…”. These patterns sometimes make the reader pause to interpret the intended meaning. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine them using subordinate clauses, while checking subject–verb agreement and sentence boundaries.

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