Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

While some individuals believe that competition at work, school or in our daily life might instill a winning spirit in people, or fulfill their ego or make them known for being the best. Some people believe that competition doesn't foster working together, as it might result in hates or division.

On one hand, when competition is being done in a school, work, our in our daily lifes, the aim is to know who is the best at that thing and most of the time they are always rewarded with a gift. For a competition to hold series of individuals are to been choosen to represent the class or sports. The individuals that participates in this competition try to know where there strengths and weakness lies and make effort on improving them. The competition might also involves various stages in which some participants are going to to be dropped out of the competiton for not meeting up with the necessary Citeria. When all of this numerous preperations are been done, some individuals starts to get jealous, because they don't have the capibility of moving on the next stage. And some people starts to do things that will hinder other people from wining the competition. Example a set football players went to party with their opponents, while partying the set of opponents jeoperdized their drinks by drugging them, and this resulted in the other not participating in the match they had against their opposing team. As a result their was hate smeer campaign was created for the opposite team.

On the other hand, some people think competition in an healthy environment drives winning spirit and also creates the best set of people that do great things in the world. It is always good to know a winner and looser because it helps you have idea on where you stand on things. It also make people believe in theirselves on they can do things and acheive things. Having a reward at a competition is also a great addition, because the person can always take a look at it and remember how they are able to win at something.

In my opinion, i think competition in an healthy environment is good as it will instill wininng spirit in individuals, and also help them on not giving up easily.

In conclusion, competition in an healthy environment where there is coperation and lack of jealousy at school work or in our daily life is a good thing.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You discuss both sides and state a consistent preference for competition in a healthy environment, so the response is relevant to the prompt. The example of players being drugged illustrates how rivalry can become harmful, while the later points about motivation, rewards and self-belief explain potential benefits. However, the two views are not developed evenly: the disadvantages receive a detailed, if confusing, example, whereas cooperation itself is only briefly mentioned and not explained as a positive alternative. Some claims, such as competition creating “the best set of people,” need clearer reasoning or support. To strengthen the response, explain how cooperation improves outcomes and develop your own position with a specific, realistic example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs beginning “On one hand” and “On the other hand,” followed by an opinion and conclusion. This helps readers identify the two perspectives. However, progression within paragraphs is uneven: the first body paragraph moves from school selection to jealousy, sabotage and a football incident without clearly connecting each point. The example’s final sentence is especially difficult to follow (“their was hate smeer campaign was created”). Linking phrases such as “as a result” and “in my opinion” are used, but some connections feel mechanical, and the conclusion largely repeats the opinion rather than drawing the discussion together. Organise each paragraph around one main claim, then explain and illustrate it in a clear sequence.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “winning spirit,” “jealous,” “rewarded” and “opposing team,” and these choices help communicate the general subject. However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation and spelling problems make parts difficult to understand. Examples include “hates” for hostility or hatred, “hate smeer campaign,” “capibility,” “jeoperdized” and “wining.” Some phrases are also unnatural, such as “meeting up with the necessary Citeria” and “a healthy environment” repeated several times. Aim for accurate, natural combinations and check spelling carefully. More precise terms such as “resentment,” “undermine a rival” and “fair competition” would help express the ideas clearly without relying on repeated wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

There are attempts to use longer sentences and subordinate clauses, for example, “because they don't have the capibility of moving on the next stage,” but complex structures are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences hard to follow. The opening begins with “While” but is left as a fragment, and “when competition is being done” is an awkward passive construction. Agreement and verb forms are inconsistent in “some people starts” and “the competition might also involves”; articles and sentence structure are also problematic in “in an healthy environment” and “their was hate smeer campaign was created.” Punctuation around the football example further obscures meaning. Practise complete sentence patterns, subject–verb agreement and article use, then proofread each sentence for a clear subject and verb.

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