Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.0)

It is often argued that competition enables individuals to grow better and achieved their long-term goals effeciently, while others believe that we should cooperate with each other instaed of doing competition, and I believe that competition plays a crucial role in individuals' development.

On the one hand, some people believe that compete with someone enables individual to grow effectively. One of the main reason is that it makes people independent and more responsible about their career. For example, in developing countries institutions tell their learners if you want to become successful you have to compete your rivals

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.0

The response gives a clear opinion that competition is important for personal development, and it begins to explain one supporting reason: competition may encourage independence and responsibility. However, it addresses only one side of the question. The view that people should cooperate is not discussed, and the opinion is not supported with a developed example; the reference to institutions in developing countries is unfinished and does not explain how competition leads to success. The response also contains 97 words, so it does not meet the required minimum of 250. To improve, discuss both views, explain your position in relation to them, and develop each main point with a relevant example and explanation.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

There is a basic attempt to organise the response: the opening introduces the two views and your opinion, and “On the one hand” signals the start of a supporting point. This gives the reader some sense of direction. However, the response stops before developing a complete argument, and there is no paragraph presenting the cooperation view or a conclusion. Connections between ideas are also limited; for example, the example about institutions is introduced but not completed or linked clearly to the claim about responsibility. Use separate paragraphs for the two views and your opinion, and connect each example to the point it supports. A concluding paragraph would help provide a complete progression.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “competition,” “cooperate,” “long-term goals,” “independent,” and “responsible.” These choices make the general subject clear. However, the range is narrow, and several word-choice, collocation, word-form, and spelling problems reduce naturalness. For instance, “doing competition” is not an idiomatic expression, “compete your rivals” uses the wrong verb pattern, and “effeciently” and “instaed” are misspelled. Try using more precise topic vocabulary and checking common collocations. Alternatives such as “compete with rivals” and “work collaboratively” would express the ideas more naturally and give you greater flexibility.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt both a complex opening sentence with “while” and a reason-and-example structure, showing some ability to combine ideas. The main message is generally understandable, but grammatical control is uneven. In “some people believe that compete with someone enables individual,” the verb pattern and singular noun form are incorrect; a clearer version is “some people believe that competing with others enables individuals.” In “One of the main reason,” the noun should be plural, and the example beginning “if you want to become successful” needs clearer sentence boundaries and punctuation. Practise gerund subjects, subject–verb agreement, articles, and punctuation, then build a wider range of accurate sentence patterns.

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