Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-22
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
Many people argue that the competition is essential at work as it keeps individuals motivated and they keep on improving their skills. In contrast, some believe that cooperation is important, because new members could face difficulty at work. I believe that a healthy competition at work is necessary, so that one individual does not gets pressed through overwork.
In corporate environment, individuals need to know regarding the boundry between taking help and advantage of their co-worker. it is understandable for new comers to take advice from their seniors and implement during their work.On the other hand, if people keep on depending on others they might make it their habit to take work from others.They may waste their time and not learn any essential skill during their work. For instance, i have a friend at work who came from same company in which i worked before. I do most of his work at office and he does not focuses on the steps needed to perform everyday tasks. This not only leds to lack of decipline but also lack of ability to perform tasks as an individual on site.
Furthermore, if individuals keep on relying on their seniors at work they may not to able to complete their own work on time and may have to work over time. This not only leads to depression, stress also affects mental health. Moreover, they may also not be able to give time to their family and loved ones. For example in Japan many salary men can be seen on trains or road side sleeping due to over work and exhaustion. Work should be divided among individuals and progress should also be monitered in this way workers would not only show improvement in their work but also their health would not get affected.
In conclusion, a healthy competition is necessary to keep workers motivated and enhance their skills which would in turn be beneficial in their career. Cooperation is also somewhat crucial for individuals who are new to the work environment.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
You present a relevant position: “a healthy competition at work is necessary,” while acknowledging that cooperation helps newcomers. The examples about your colleague and overworked Japanese employees also support points about dependence and workload. However, the discussion is uneven. The competition side is mainly asserted as motivating workers and improving skills, with little explanation or example, while much of the essay focuses on the risks of relying on colleagues. The task asks you to discuss both views, so explain more fully how cooperation benefits people and why competition can be positive, then compare these benefits before reaching your conclusion. Your final position is understandable, but the argument would be clearer if you distinguished healthy competition from excessive competition and linked that distinction to your opinion.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs and a conclusion. Connectors such as “In contrast,” “Furthermore,” and “In conclusion” help signal the direction of the argument, and the examples generally follow the points they illustrate. However, progression is not always smooth: the first body paragraph moves from cooperation and dependence to competition without clearly explaining the relationship, and the second shifts from reliance on seniors to overtime and family life. Some links are mechanical, and references such as “in this way” do not make the connection between dividing work, monitoring progress and improving health fully clear. Use topic sentences that state each paragraph’s main claim, and add explicit links showing how each example supports that claim.
Lexical Resource: Band 6.0
You use an adequate range of vocabulary for the topic, including “motivated,” “implement,” “relying,” “exhaustion,” and “enhance their skills.” These choices allow you to discuss workplace relationships and consequences, and the meaning is generally clear. There are also some inaccurate or awkward choices and spelling errors, such as “boundry,” “decipline,” “monitered,” and “salary men.” Phrases such as “take work from others” and “pressed through overwork” do not express the intended ideas naturally. Aim for more precise workplace collocations, for example, describing employees as “delegating tasks” or being “overburdened.” Proofread spelling and choose expressions that clearly distinguish receiving support from avoiding responsibility.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5
You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, including conditional structures such as “if people keep on depending on others” and cause-and-effect sentences beginning “This not only leads to…”. Most ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. Examples include “does not gets” instead of “does not get,” “they may not to able” instead of “they may not be able,” and “This not only leads to depression, stress also affects mental health,” where the sentence structure is incomplete or incorrectly joined. There are also inconsistent capitalisation and punctuation, including lowercase “it” and “i” and missing spaces after full stops. Review verb forms after auxiliaries, sentence boundaries, and punctuation; more accurate control of these patterns would make your complex sentences easier to follow.
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