Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-25
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.
Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
People agrue that the competiveness at job, at schools and in day to day fumctions ia a good thing as it motivate to achieve something. While others think there should be peace and cooperation between people, rather than competitiom in them because sometimes competition my harm in negative way. This essay will discuss the both view and i will provide my personal opinion in upcoming paragraphs.
To commernce with, it is true that competition is best thing as it helps scholars to study well and score good marks. As well as, at work place colleagues competit for apprasial and promotion. For instance, students competit with each other to score highest marks which encourage them to study hard or in sports activity they have competition to win the tropy, as a result they work hard to achieve it. Moreover, competition increases discipline in individuals, as they focus on their goal with they have to achieve. As a student, they focus on studies, as a sports player they maintain their diet and work on physical work and as a employee they concerate to enhance their performance.
However, alongside the benefits, there are several drawbacks of competition. First and foremost, stress and anxiety as continous pressure to achieve something may depress a person. Moreover, their mental health can be triggered because they may have fear of failure. As a result, many individuals does not participate in any competition because they have fear that they may fail and society will betray them.
To conclude, according to me, competition have both positive and negatives, as it motivates people to success in their life according to their needs, while it may make person depress, anxious and give pressure to mind.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You address the topic by explaining benefits of competition, such as encouraging students to study and employees to seek promotion, and drawbacks such as stress and fear of failure. However, the task asks you to discuss both competition and cooperation, and the essay gives almost no account of why people should cooperate or how cooperation helps. Your own position is also not fully clear: the conclusion says competition has both positive and negative effects, but does not state whether you favour more cooperation or competition overall. The examples are relevant, but several points—especially the effects on mental health—are asserted rather than explained. Develop the cooperation side and make your opinion explicit throughout to address the task more fully.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0
The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on benefits, a paragraph on drawbacks, and a conclusion. Sequencing is generally easy to follow, and signposts such as “Moreover,” “However,” and “To conclude” help show the direction of the argument. However, the progression is not fully balanced because the paragraph beginning “However” discusses only the harms of competition, rather than developing the contrasting view of cooperation. Some linking is mechanical, with repeated “Moreover” and “As a result,” and the opening sentence’s “While” construction is left without a clear main clause. Use topic sentences that directly distinguish the two views, and connect examples to the point they support more clearly.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “competition,” “promotion,” “discipline,” “stress,” “anxiety,” and “fear of failure,” so the reader can understand the main ideas. However, the range is limited and several spelling and word-choice errors make parts of the response difficult to read, for example “agrue,” “competitiveness,” “day to day fumctions,” and “society will betray them.” Some expressions are also unnatural or imprecise, such as “competition is best thing” and “mental health can be triggered.” Aim for accurate, natural collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise language for cooperation—such as “share responsibilities” or “work towards a common goal”—would also help you discuss both sides of the question.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt a mixture of simple and longer sentences, including clauses introduced by “as,” “because,” and “while.” This gives the response some structural variety, but complex sentences are often faulty and errors occur frequently enough to affect clarity. For example, “While others think…” is not joined to a complete main clause, and “competition have both positive and negatives” has subject–verb and form errors. Other examples include “it motivate,” “many individuals does not participate,” and “as they focus on their goal with they have to achieve.” Work on subject–verb agreement, complete sentence construction, and clear clause connections. Shorter, accurately controlled sentences would make your reasoning easier to follow while you build confidence with complex forms.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.