Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Certain individuals believe that competition at workplace, school and generally in regular life is a positive thing. While the others contradict this thought. This essay will discuss both these cases.

Firstly, I reckon the concept of healthy competition has generally shown positive results in a workspace, be it of any kind. For instance, healthy competition among students in the classroom, will result in good teamwork but also allow an individual to have a competitive spirit. Similarly, competition amongst colleagues can help with creating a friendly environment that is not toxic along with efficient results that will be benefiting the organisation. It is proven that human brain works more focused and builds high self-esteem, when accompanied by a competitive partner. Example, runners approaching closer to the finish line, would give every last bit of their strength just to compete and get ahead from the player infront.

In contrast, a competitive intension that comes from ego, jealousy or pride of a person, only leads to toxic environment and more confilcts between the team. Students getting bullied for losing/winning or colleagues being jealous of increments and promotions amongst eachother; all these bad intentions destructs the entire purpose of competition. A toxic competition not only breaks relationships but also the sanity of a person, one can even get depressed because of this constant fear of falling behind and losing to others. At any workspace, classroom or even in daily life; one should make sure that he or she are creating a healthy competition to compete and grow together instead of feeling superior to wining.

To conclude, i strongly believe that a healthy competition can bring out a lot of positive changes in an environment. Problem arises and conflicts happen only if the intentions of the competitior is not to win, learn and grow but to feel superior, that has to change.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You present a clear preference for healthy competition and discuss both competition and its harmful forms, so the response is relevant to the prompt. However, the two views are not fully balanced: the opposing view is mainly described as toxic competition caused by ego or jealousy, rather than explaining the case for cooperation itself. The classroom example also says competition produces “good teamwork” without showing how, and the claim about the brain and self-esteem is asserted rather than supported. Your position is clearest in the conclusion, but “This essay will discuss both these cases” does not establish your view at the outset. Explain cooperation’s benefits directly and develop each example to make the argument more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph supporting healthy competition, a contrasting paragraph, and a conclusion. Signposts such as “Firstly,” “In contrast,” and “To conclude” make the progression easy to follow, and the examples generally sit with the relevant point. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent arrangement and shows some movement towards more flexible organisation. However, the opening “While the others contradict this thought” is a fragment and does not connect the two positions smoothly. Some links are also mechanical, and the second body paragraph combines several effects without a clear sequence. Use complete linking sentences and organise each paragraph around one main claim, followed by explanation and an example.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range for the topic, including terms such as “competitive spirit,” “toxic environment,” “self-esteem,” and “falling behind.” These choices help communicate the contrast between constructive and harmful competition, and the meaning is generally clear. You also attempt more specific vocabulary, but some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or awkward: “competition at workplace,” “competitive intension,” and “destructs the entire purpose” do not sound natural in context. Spelling errors such as “confilcts,” “infront,” and “competitior” also reduce accuracy. Aim for precise, natural combinations and check spelling carefully; for example, use “competition in the workplace,” “competitive motives,” and “undermines the purpose of competition.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses with “while,” “because,” and “if,” and most of the argument remains understandable. However, errors in sentence construction, agreement, articles, and punctuation are noticeable and sometimes make the reader pause. “While the others contradict this thought” is an incomplete sentence, while “human brain works” needs an article and “these bad intentions destructs” has subject–verb disagreement. In “one should make sure that he or she are creating,” the pronoun and verb do not agree. Commas also interrupt some sentences unnecessarily. Practise building complete sentences and checking each subject against its verb, while retaining your attempts at subordinate clauses.

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