Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-11-02

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Some people believe, it is a good thing that if we have a competition at work, at school, and in our daily life. While others believe that cooperation is more important than competing against each other.

Firstly, competition for students in schools and employees at work benefits for them to complete their task earlier. In schools, students feel very jeolous about other competitive student in sports, studies etc because of that jeolous they focus more on task. Moreover, competition motivates us to increase our work time and it helps us to achieve goal faster. Along that working place are also have same benefits for working with competition.So completing our works in time with competition is helps to reach their strategy.

Secondly, focusing more on competition may it increase stress and it disturb our health also. Working with mental pressure is also effects our health instead of achieving. So focusing more on something is better but feeling stress about something is not good for health enough. some students are mentally disturb in some situation with losing in their competetion it should be drawback for over competitive. sometimes it needs to fullfill our work with good output instead of fast output with incomplete.

In conclusion, competition with someone is good for people and it helps to achieve goal faster like in our childhood we would like win any sports with our friends. Likewise, working competetively with employees leads to submit work on time. In addition, it also has drawbracks for people who are feeling over depressive for focussing more on their output and some are not able to take their failure with someone who competes.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both sides by describing how competition may motivate students and employees, then noting stress and the value of completing work well. Your conclusion also indicates that competition can be useful but harmful when people struggle with failure. However, the discussion of cooperation is not developed: it is presented mainly as “more important” in the introduction, without explaining how cooperating benefits people or giving a concrete example. Your position is therefore only partly clear, and several claims—such as competition helping people “achieve goal faster”—are asserted rather than explained. To strengthen the response, develop both views with specific reasons and examples, and state directly when cooperation should be preferred over competition.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, two body paragraphs beginning “Firstly” and “Secondly,” and a conclusion. This gives the reader a basic route through the discussion. However, progression within paragraphs is uneven, and the second body paragraph shifts between stress, health, students’ reactions to losing, and work quality without clearly connecting these points. Linking phrases such as “Moreover,” “Along that,” and “So” are sometimes awkward or do not show the relationship between ideas precisely. The conclusion repeats points from the body rather than bringing the two views together. Use clearer topic sentences, group related ideas, and make each sentence’s connection to the next explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary, including “competition,” “cooperation,” “motivates,” “mental pressure,” and “drawbacks,” so the main topic is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the meaning difficult to follow. For example, “jeolous” appears repeatedly where “jealous” is intended, while “working with competition” and “over depressive” are not natural expressions in this context. There are also spelling errors such as “competetion” and “drawbracks.” Build a more precise set of topic-related phrases and check spelling; for instance, describe competition as “encouraging people to improve” and its effects as “increased stress” or “fear of failure.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast with “While others believe…” and a reason introduced by “because of that.” However, complex constructions are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences hard to interpret. Examples include “it is a good thing that if we have a competition,” “students feel very jeolous about other competitive student,” and “competition is helps to reach their strategy.” These show problems with clause structure, agreement, and verb forms. Sentence boundaries and punctuation also need attention, as in “competition.So.” Practise building accurate subject–verb–object sentences first, then add one clear subordinate clause at a time. Check agreement, articles, plurals, and verb forms during revision.

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