Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Today, everyone try to be more successful then others so, all the people are engage with the competitive activites. Some people believe that competition is beneficial while other think that we want to cooprate with other rather than competiting with than. From my perspective, The participants of competitive activities are mentally prepared for overcoming all the difficulties, although they are not an intalligent by birth.

Competition encourages people to work hard and achieve your goal. However, it donot give you time to focus on your self, it made you able to get a good repotation in your feild. The students who are the perticipants of competitive activities are able to overcome all the hurduls which is coming on their path of success. All rich people in any society enjoy tje competitive environment because it enable them to learn more about their feilds and find the mistakes which they are making in their life and businessess. For instence, the people who live their whole life in any competitive activities they are able to know how to learn from those people who are trying to defeat your self and to find their mistake.

Now, Some people try to cooperate with their competitors to take some time to fuces on their self. if these persons are hard worker they must become the successers of there society because they spend their time with them and made themself a strong enbeatable men.

In conclusion, if the person is hard worker he should cooperate with competitive activeties but if he is not a worker he should participate in competitive activities because it make them able to get success in their life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You address the topic by presenting reasons for competition and cooperation, and you state a view in the introduction and conclusion. However, the discussion is only partially developed, which is why the response remains limited in its coverage of the task. The benefits of competition are more apparent, such as working hard and learning from others, but the cooperation paragraph is brief and does not clearly explain how cooperation helps people or provide a relevant example. Your position is also difficult to interpret: the conclusion says a hard worker “should cooperate with competitive activities,” while a less hardworking person “should participate” in them, which does not clearly answer which approach you support. Explain both views more fully and state a consistent, direct opinion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The response has an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion, so the reader can identify its broad structure. Some progression is also signalled by “However,” “Now,” and “In conclusion.” Nevertheless, the ideas within paragraphs are often difficult to follow: the competition paragraph moves from students overcoming obstacles to rich people learning from mistakes, without clearly connecting these examples to one central point. References such as “them” and “their self” are unclear, and the final contrast does not follow logically from the preceding discussion. Use topic sentences, develop one main idea at a time, and make pronoun references explicit. More accurate and purposeful links between claims and examples would make the organisation easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You attempt vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “competitive environment,” “overcome,” “difficulties,” and “cooperate.” However, the range is limited and errors in spelling, word form, and collocation are frequent enough to make parts of the response difficult to understand. Examples include “intalligent,” “reputation,” “hurduls,” “fuces,” and “unbeatable”; several key words are also repeated, particularly “competitive activities” and “success.” Some phrases are unclear or unnatural, such as “successers of there society” and “cooperate with competitive activities.” Build a more reliable set of topic vocabulary and check spelling and natural word combinations. Precise wording will help communicate your ideas without requiring the reader to infer your meaning.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, including a concession with “although” and a conditional sentence beginning “if.” This shows some range, and the main topic can generally be understood. However, errors in agreement, verb forms, articles, and sentence construction recur. For example, “everyone try” should be “everyone tries,” “all the people are engage” needs a correct passive form, and “it donot give you time” has an incorrect auxiliary and verb form. The sentence beginning “The students who are…” also has a mismatch between “hurdles” and “which is coming.” Practise checking each sentence for a clear subject and correctly formed verb, and use punctuation to separate complete ideas. More accurate control of these patterns would improve clarity.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.