Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-11-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing. Others believe that we should try to cooperate more, rather than competing against each other.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Yes i agrree that some people think that competition at work, at school and in daily life is a good thing.Becuase when we compete with someone in any activity so we trying to hardwork more and more like in our school i have a compitation with my friends that i will be get first position in class so trying my best and when i am doing hardwork so i study more and more and more so more knowledge about my topic and is daliy life activities .For example i playing cricket very well and in a batting i want to improve my batting from other because when i have a match so i should have a good batting skills from other if dont compete with other so they were be better than me and they will won the match so competing with others it is a good thing. and also in a work you should complete your at time . and compete with other .And also some others people believe that we should try to cooperate more,rather than competing against each other.So my personal view is we also cooperate with other because if we competing with they will be not take it good .For example like if we competing with someone in study and you study hard and he also looking you that why he is competing with me he will get jelouse from you and also he will not make a good behaviour with you so both things are good we should do both and when we doing there type activity so first we should think about both sides.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You address both views and give a personal position: competition can encourage effort, while cooperation is also important. The school example about trying to achieve first position and the cricket example are relevant, but they mainly repeat the idea that competition motivates you; the cooperation point is less fully explained and relies on a possible jealous reaction rather than showing how cooperation helps people. Your conclusion that “both things are good” is present, though it does not clearly explain when each approach is most useful. The response is 242 words, so it is 8 words below the required minimum; the 31 words copied from the task prompt were not counted. Develop the cooperation argument and add a specific supporting example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

The response follows a broadly understandable sequence: it first supports competition, then introduces cooperation, and ends with your view that both matter. Examples help the reader follow the main points. However, the ideas are presented as one long paragraph, and transitions such as “and also” and “for example” are repeated without clearly showing how each point relates to the previous one. Some links are difficult to follow, particularly the shift from the cricket example to work and then to cooperation. Use separate paragraphs for the two views and your conclusion, and organise each paragraph around one main idea. Clearer linking phrases and references would make the progression easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use basic vocabulary relevant to the topic, including “compete,” “cooperate,” “hardwork,” “knowledge,” and “behaviour,” and the reader can generally identify your intended meaning. However, the range is limited and several words or phrases are repeated, especially “competing,” “more and more,” and “good thing.” There are also spelling and word-choice problems, such as “compitation,” “jelouse,” and “complete your at time,” which make parts of the response less clear or natural. Build a wider set of topic-specific expressions for motivation, teamwork, and achievement, and check spelling and collocations. More precise vocabulary would help you explain the contrast between individual effort and shared goals.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

You attempt to connect ideas in longer sentences using “because,” “so,” and “when,” and some simple meanings are understandable. However, sentence structures are very limited and many longer sentences are difficult to follow because of errors in verb forms, agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries. For example, “when we compete … so we trying” lacks a correctly formed verb, while “they will won the match” uses an incorrect verb form. The response also contains run-on sentences, such as the opening section, where several ideas are joined without clear punctuation. Practise forming accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with subordinate clauses and check tense and subject–verb agreement.

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