Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

To begin with , there are several reasons this future to save money is important in our daily life . The main reasons is that young people this future save the money san have dircet people on society . Many young people face this issue in their daily lives , it can influence their lifestyle in different way . For example it may affect people's work , Education , Money , Health or relationship . In addition , young people and families save the money secure this future , can also be influenced by this situation . The important point is that this is my agree young people save the money and my pocket money recived and the save money other problem and work the future can have positve effect . The important point is that future issue can have both negative and positve effects . It mainly depends on hoe people use it and how they deal with the situation .

Moreover , there are some possible way to improve the situation . Young people should have proper knowledge and should make responsible decisions . The government , schools and young people , families can also play an important role by providing guidance and support . For instance simple rules and better awareness can help people make better choices .

In conclusion , different challnge but future this save that issue is important that should not be ignored . If young people and which hard work togather , negative effects can be reduced way to improve the situation .

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

The response refers to saving money and young people, and it includes a few relevant points, such as the idea that savings can provide security and that guidance from schools and families may help. However, it does not clearly answer how far you agree or disagree. The sentence “this is my agree” does not establish a clear position, and the discussion shifts to “the situation” and its positive or negative effects without explaining what situation is meant. The examples about work, education, health and relationships are listed rather than connected to saving money. To strengthen the response, state your degree of agreement directly, then develop two relevant reasons with clear explanations or examples showing how saving benefits people’s future.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

There is some basic organisation: the response begins with an introductory point, uses a separate paragraph beginning “Moreover,” and ends with a conclusion. Linking expressions such as “To begin with,” “In addition” and “For instance” show an attempt to connect ideas. However, the overall progression is difficult to follow because the central point is not maintained, and several sentences do not clearly relate to the previous one. For example, the move from saving money to effects on “work, Education, Money, Health or relationship” is not explained. References such as “this situation” and “this issue” are also unclear. Organise the essay around a clear position and give each body paragraph one reason, followed by an explanation and a relevant example.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses a basic range of topic-related vocabulary, including “save money,” “future,” “guidance,” “support” and “awareness.” These words help indicate the general subject, but vocabulary is often repetitive and several phrases are inaccurate or difficult to understand. For instance, “this future to save money,” “have dircet people on society” and “the save money other problem” do not express clear meanings. Spelling errors such as “recived,” “positve” and “challnge” also make reading harder. Build a more precise set of phrases for discussing personal finance, such as financial security, budgeting and unexpected expenses, and check spelling and collocations. Clear, accurate wording will help your relevant ideas come across.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response attempts some longer sentences and uses basic connectors, but sentence structures are very limited and errors frequently obscure the intended meaning. For example, “The main reasons is that young people this future save the money” has problems with agreement and sentence construction, while “Young people should have proper knowledge and should make responsible decisions” is a clearer simple structure. Other sentences lack a clear subject–verb relationship, as in “If young people and which hard work togather, negative effects can be reduced.” Punctuation spacing and capitalisation are also inconsistent. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then combine them with clauses using “because,” “so” and “if.” Check that each sentence has a clear subject and verb and that singular and plural forms agree.

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