Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-16

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

It is important for everyone, including young people, to save money for their future.

To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent years every person including our young generation save money for their future. It is widely believed that this trend increasingly significant in all the modren societies accross the globe. I am strongly in favor of the the statement because of some important arguments about the statement. This essay will discuss the paramount reasons on the statement, people store the money for the future.

To begin with the first and vital reason of people saving their money for further life, most of people face sudden health problem which encourage them to save money to tackle the health problem and use their money at the spot in case of any emergency. For instence, a massive figure of people have insurance for their health and preserve their wealth for future. This may result keep people calm in case of any serious problem even our young people also prefer to keep insurance. Additionally, most of people probably want to give their children modren education and save their monthly income and money for their pupils advancement. For example, now education in very important for every person, everyone in worried about their children education and they need money for attaining best opportunities for youngers. This may lead to saving amount in banks for future use.

Similarly, in these days, most of our generation and youth want to start their business and want to generate good reveniew for their future. For instance, youth and most of our citizen huge amount to money to invest it in different business whenever they needed.

At a glance, although saving of money is useful for business some of the drawbacks shuold not be ignored like saving of money in banks without using in any process. I think saving of money is best approach for people wh want to inverst money and want to use them for emergencies.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you strongly agree that people, including young people, should save. You give relevant reasons—health emergencies, children’s education and starting a business—and the health and education points include examples, so the response addresses the task. However, these ideas are not developed equally. The business paragraph is brief and its example is difficult to understand, while the final paragraph introduces a drawback about money sitting unused in banks without explaining how this affects your overall position. To strengthen the response, explain each reason with a clearer cause-and-effect link and show how the drawback fits with your agreement. A more specific example of young people saving for a goal would also make the argument more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, supporting paragraphs and a concluding paragraph. Phrases such as “To begin with” and “Similarly” help signal the sequence of points, and the health and education reasons are grouped together. However, progression is uneven: the business paragraph is very short, and the final paragraph shifts to a drawback without clearly connecting it to the position stated earlier. Some linking phrases are mechanical or do not accurately describe the relationship between ideas, such as “At a glance” before the conclusion. Improve cohesion by giving each paragraph a clear central point, developing it in a logical order, and using transitions that show the precise relationship between claims.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “health problem,” “insurance,” “education,” “business” and “emergencies,” which makes your main subject clear. There are also attempts at more formal expressions, such as “paramount reasons” and “generate good revenue.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or unclear, including “further life,” “at the spot,” “pupils advancement” and “huge amount to money.” Spelling errors such as “modren,” “accross,” “instence” and “reveniew” also reduce accuracy. Aim for natural, precise combinations—for example, “future needs,” “in an emergency” and “invest a substantial amount”—and check spelling and word forms carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including clauses with “because,” “which” and “although.” This gives the response some structural variety, and the main ideas can generally be followed. However, errors in sentence construction and grammatical forms recur. For example, “every person … save money” needs subject–verb agreement, while “This may result keep people calm” has an incorrect verb pattern. Articles and plurals are also inconsistent in phrases such as “most of people” and “a massive figure of people.” The final sentence, “people wh want to inverst money and want to use them,” contains unclear pronoun reference and faulty structure. Practise accurate agreement, articles and verb patterns, then proofread longer sentences for clarity.

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