Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-02

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The charts below give information on the location and types of dance classes young people in a town in Australia are currently attending.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

I'm working a data colletion of dance classes in australia. After gathering some data, here's some summarized information of diffferent locations and ages:

1. Private Studios:

Overall data comparison finds that most of the people prefer private studios. This may be due to veriaty of facilities and similar interest based interactions between people.

2. School Halls:

Second most gathered dance classes are being held in school halls after school which is 24%. It is assumed that students may organize classes for prospering or grooming for sake of professional career.

3. Community halls & Others:

Almost 24% people according to total data collected are attending classes in community hall and some other places. It includes people of elder age who prefer to spend free time interecting with community.

4. College-based studios:

Least number of people attend dance practices in college studios. Total percentage is hardly 10% of people. That may be due to lack of interest in college students for dance.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response addresses the task only minimally and adopts an inappropriate personal, informal letter-like style at the beginning, writing 'I'm working a data colletion...'. While it attempts to report some information from the charts, the data presented is inaccurate and confused. For example, it misquotes the percentage for community halls as 24% instead of 18%, and fails entirely to report the information regarding the types of dance classes by age group for ballet, tap, and modern dance. Furthermore, the inclusion of personal speculation about why students attend certain classes detracts from an objective summary of visual data. To reach a higher standard, the writer must accurately report the key features from all parts of the visual prompt, maintain an objective academic tone, and avoid inventing or misreading figures.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5

The text is organized into a numbered list format which provides some basic structure, but it lacks clear overall progression and logical cohesion suitable for an academic report. The introduction is disjointed and does not effectively set up an overview of the charts. Cohesive devices are minimal and repetitive, and referencing is sometimes unclear, such as shifting abruptly between different studio locations and age groups without smooth transitional links. Paragraphing is dictated by a list format rather than standard academic essay structure. To improve coherence and cohesion, the writer should use standard paragraphing, introduce a clear overall summary at the beginning, and employ a wider range of appropriate cohesive devices to connect ideas logically throughout the response.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

Vocabulary use is limited and basic, with noticeable spelling and word-choice errors that occasionally impede communication. Examples include 'colletion' instead of collection, 'diffferent', 'veriaty', 'interecting', and 'elder age'. The student attempts some less common vocabulary such as 'prospering' and 'grooming', but these are used inaccurately in this context. Repetitive phrasing is also evident across the response. To achieve a higher lexical score, the writer needs to expand their vocabulary range, use precise terminology relevant to data reporting, improve spelling accuracy, and ensure that collocations are natural and appropriate for formal academic writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response demonstrates a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying heavily on simple sentences and basic patterns. There are frequent errors in grammar, articles, prepositions, and verb forms that can cause difficulty for the reader, such as 'I'm working a data colletion', 'most of the people prefer', 'Second most gathered dance classes are being held', and 'Total percentage is hardly 10% of people'. Attempts at complex structures are often faulty and lack control. To improve grammatical range and accuracy, the writer should focus on mastering basic sentence construction, ensuring correct subject-verb agreement, using appropriate prepositions within grammatical patterns, and reducing the frequency of basic structural errors.

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