Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The charts below give information on the location and types of dance classes young people in a town in Australia are currently attending.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Here this graph show the diffrent number of people dancing in studios or clubs .People in private sectors are at high levels .In private studios ,maximum number of people dance there and very small number of people go in college based studios.tere is large didfference between private and college based studios.

We cannot do anything here to chose any place for dancing.The third one isschool hall where one third percent of people go there ,and the last one is thatcommunity hall and other .It is the place where local people go actually.So there is large difference batween all of them.In private studios 48 percent people go there which is at high rate there than others.The second one is 24 percent people go i school hall but after school time .The other one is community hall and others 18npercent peoplego to this place ..and the last one is college based studios ..only 10 percent people go to this plce ..We can compare the clearest difference between private and colllege based studios

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response identifies the main location figures, including private studios at 48%, school halls at 24%, community halls at 18%, and college-based studios at 10%, and correctly notes the contrast between the highest and lowest shares. However, the task asks about both location and types of classes by age group, and the response omits the entire dance-type chart: it gives no comparison of ballet, tap, or modern classes for either age group. Some descriptions are also inaccurate or unsupported, such as saying school halls account for “one third percent” and claiming community halls are where “local people go.” As a result, the report addresses only part of the visual and offers limited overview. To improve, summarise both charts and highlight the key age-group differences as well as the location pattern.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

There is a basic attempt to organise the location information, beginning with private studios and then moving through the other venues. Repeated references to the percentages also help the reader recognise the topic. However, ideas are not arranged into a clear report structure: there is no distinct overview, and the response repeats the private-versus-college comparison several times. Connections between points are often unclear, as in “The third one isschool hall” and “the last one is thatcommunity hall,” where the sequence depends on an unstated ordering. The sentence “We cannot do anything here to chose any place for dancing” interrupts the description rather than advancing it. Group the information into an introduction, overview, and focused detail paragraphs, and use clear comparisons instead of repeated listing.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The response uses a small set of relevant terms, including “private studios,” “college based studios,” “school hall,” and “percent,” so the reader can generally identify the locations being discussed. It also attempts comparison through phrases such as “large difference” and “high rate.” However, vocabulary is basic and repetitive, and several choices are imprecise or unsuitable for describing chart data: “people dancing in studios or clubs” does not accurately represent the full chart, while “private sectors” is not the right term for private studios. Spelling errors such as “diffrent,” “tere,” and “colllege” further reduce control. Build a more precise range for reporting proportions and comparisons, and check spelling and collocations carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The response mainly uses short, simple statements and attempts a few longer structures, for example, “In private studios, maximum number of people dance there and very small number of people go in college based studios.” However, grammatical control is inconsistent, and errors frequently make the sentences awkward or unclear. Examples include “this graph show,” “there is large difference,” and “The second one is 24 percent people go i school hall,” which show problems with agreement, articles, and sentence construction. Punctuation and spacing are also unreliable, with run-on or poorly separated clauses such as “The other one is community hall and others 18npercent peoplego.” Practise accurate basic sentence patterns first, then add controlled comparisons using structures such as “whereas” and “compared with.”

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.