Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-03
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world.
Do you think this is a positive or negative development?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.0)
The pie chart delineate the proportion of location of dance classes and the bar chart illustrates the types of dance classes are currently attending by young generations in a town in Australia.
Overall, it is evident that, almost half of the people go to private studios for dancing, while college-based studios accounted for the lowest segment. Moreover, ballet dance claases are the most popular one among the people under 11 years old, whereas modern dance type is mostly prefered by 11-16 years old people.
In terms of dance location, 48% of the participants prefer to attend classes in private studios. This is followed by attending classes school halls after-school and community halls & other at around 24% and 18%, respectively. In contrast, college-based studios account for only 10%, making it the lowest category.
On the other hand, more than 600 students of under 11 years old like ballet dance and have a less likely appeal for modern dance. Meanwhile, roughly 510 pupil with 11-16 age groups like the modern dance and just under 300 students enjoy the ballet dance. Around 450 student under 11 age group prefer tap dance more than 11-16 group.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 1.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 1.0
The response is completely off-topic. The prompt asks for an essay regarding the global food trade, but you have written a report describing a pie chart and a bar chart about dance classes. Consequently, you have failed to address the task requirements entirely. Furthermore, the response is significantly under the 250-word minimum, which further impacts the score. Because the content does not relate to the prompt provided, it is impossible to evaluate your ability to develop an argument or provide a position on the topic of food production. You must ensure you read the prompt carefully and provide the correct task type (essay vs. report).
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response is organised into paragraphs, and there is a basic attempt at logical progression by separating the location data from the age-group data. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'In terms of', and 'On the other hand' to link ideas. However, because the content is irrelevant to the prompt, the overall coherence is undermined. The paragraphing is functional, but the lack of connection to the actual task makes the structure ineffective. To improve, focus on ensuring that your introduction clearly states your position on the essay topic and that each paragraph develops a specific point related to that topic.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary to describe data, such as 'proportion', 'segment', 'accounted for', and 'participants'. There are some spelling errors, such as 'claases' and 'prefered', and some awkward phrasing like 'have a less likely appeal for'. While the vocabulary is adequate for describing a chart, it is not being used to discuss the complex social or economic issues required by the essay prompt. To reach a higher band, you need to expand your vocabulary to include more academic and topic-specific terminology related to global trade and consumer habits.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'types of dance classes are currently attending' (should be 'being attended') and '510 pupil' (should be 'pupils'). Subject-verb agreement and pluralisation issues are present throughout the text. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors limits your score. To improve, focus on proofreading your work for basic agreement errors and ensuring that your verb forms are consistent with the intended meaning. Increasing the variety of complex structures while maintaining accuracy will also help improve your score.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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