Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-09-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries nowadays, consumers can go to a supermarket and buy food produced all over the world.

Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

The pie chart delineates the proportion of location for dance classes and the bar chart illustrates the types of dance classes are currently being attended by young generations in a town in Australia.

Overall, it is evident that, almost half of the people go to private studios for dancing, while college-based studios accounted for the lowest segment. Moreover, ballet dance classes are the most popular one among the people under 11 years old, whereas modern dance type is mostly preferred by 11-16 years old people.

In terms of dance location, 48% of the participants prefer to attend classes in private studios. This is followed by attending classes in school halls after-school and community halls & other at around 24% and 18%, respectively. In contrast, college-based studios account for only 10%, making it the lowest category.

On the other hand, more than 600 students of under 11 years old like ballet dance and have a less likely appeal for modern dance. Meanwhile, roughly 510 pupils with 11-16 age groups like the modern dance and just under 300 students enjoy the ballet dance. Around 450 students under 11 age group prefer tap dance more than 11-16 group.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 2.0

The response is completely off-topic. The prompt asks for an opinion essay regarding the global food trade, but you have written a report describing two charts about dance classes. Because you have failed to address the task prompt entirely, this falls into the lowest band for Task Achievement. Additionally, the response is significantly under the 250-word minimum requirement, which further impacts the score. To improve, you must carefully read the task instructions and ensure your essay directly answers the specific question asked.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

Despite being off-topic, the text itself is structured logically as a report. You use paragraphing to separate the overview from the specific data points, and you employ some cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'In terms of', and 'On the other hand'. However, because the content does not relate to the prompt, the overall coherence of the essay as a response to the task is non-existent. The progression of ideas is clear within the context of a data report, but it fails to meet the requirements of an IELTS Task 2 essay.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

You demonstrate a sufficient range of vocabulary for describing data, such as 'delineates', 'proportion', 'segment', and 'accounted for'. These terms are appropriate for a report-style task. However, there are some awkward phrasings, such as 'types of dance classes are currently being attended' and 'have a less likely appeal for'. While the vocabulary is generally functional, it is being used in the wrong context due to the failure to address the essay prompt.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as 'While college-based studios accounted for the lowest segment' and 'This is followed by attending classes in school halls'. There are some grammatical inaccuracies, such as 'the types of dance classes are currently being attended' (should be 'the types of dance classes currently being attended') and '11-16 age groups' (should be 'the 11-16 age group'). Punctuation is generally acceptable, but the grammatical control is inconsistent.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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