Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-11-06

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You would like to reduce your working hours in order to study part time.

Write a letter to your boss. In your letter

• explain why you want to reduce your working hours
• say which hours you would like to work
• describe how your part-time studies would benefit your employer

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Dear Mr. Smith,

Hello, good day.

I am happy to know that the company has grow, but some changes had affect me, such as additional of working hours. During my prior working hours, 8 hours, when I arrived home, I still have the time to prepare myself and have enough sleep despite of clocking out from work at 8 pm and then clocking in to work at exactly 7 am, despite of having some transportation I can still do these things. I am writing to you to ask for consideration to reduce my working hours from 10 hours to 8 hours, because of this additional of working hours I can't prepare myself when I arrived home and can't have enough sleep, which this affects me when I work. When I don't have enough sleep I can't work well. If you consider my request I can work properly at my tasks.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5

The letter gives a clear reason for requesting shorter hours: the longer schedule leaves you unable to prepare for work and get enough sleep, which affects your performance. However, it addresses only part of the task. You request a reduction from ten hours to eight, but do not specify the actual hours or days you would like to work. Most importantly, there is no mention of part-time study or how it would benefit your employer, so two key points are missing. The explanation of the effect of sleep on your work is relevant, but the request would be more complete if you stated your study plans and linked the skills or knowledge gained to your role. A more formal, direct opening would also suit a letter to your boss.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The main purpose is understandable: you describe the effect of the longer schedule and then make a request. The sequence from the previous hours to the current problem and its impact on work gives the reader some organisation. However, the letter is presented as one long paragraph, and several ideas are crowded into a single sentence, particularly the account of arriving home, sleeping, and commuting. This makes the progression difficult to follow. Linking phrases such as “because of” and “when” are repeated, while the opening “Hello, good day” does not help move the message forward. Separate the background, request, and employer benefit into paragraphs, and use clearer transitions to show how each point relates to the next.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough basic vocabulary to communicate the central concern, including “working hours,” “reduce,” “enough sleep,” and “work properly.” The topic is generally clear, but the range is limited and some word choices or combinations sound unnatural, which can make parts of the letter harder to interpret. For example, “additional of working hours” and “some transportation” do not express the intended ideas precisely; “extra working hours” and “commuting” would be more natural. “Prepare myself” is also vague in this context, and “prepare for the next working day” would clarify your meaning. Aim for precise workplace vocabulary and avoid repeating “working hours” and “work” where a more specific expression is available.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response attempts longer sentences and uses clauses with “when,” “because,” and “if,” showing some variety beyond simple statements. However, these complex sentences are often faulty or difficult to follow. For instance, “the company has grow” has an incorrect verb form, and “some changes had affect me” has an incorrect tense and verb form. In “when I arrived home, I still have the time,” the tense shifts inconsistently; the final sentence beginning “If you consider my request” also needs clearer sentence structure. Several clauses are joined together without effective punctuation, especially in the long description of your schedule. Use shorter sentences to control tense and clause structure, then check subject–verb agreement and verb forms.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

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