Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-07-28
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
You would like to reduce your working hours in order to study part time.
Write a letter to your boss. In your letter
- explain why you want to reduce your working hours
- say which hours you would like to work
- describe how your part-time studies would benefit your employer
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear ....................................,
Student answer (Band 6.5)
Dear Sir,
I am writing to inform you that I am currently working as a full time security supervisor and requested to change it to part time.
I recently decided to enhance my skill as worked as a security supervisor for more than 3 years at Group Health Centre and working here gives me plenty of knowledge, so I enroll in police foundation course in Sault College in Sault Ste. Marie. Because of going back to school it lead to work only 20 hours in a week as per law the student can work.
Joining the police foundation course not only help me enhance my knowledge but also it gives the hands-on training as well which assist me to work at the major site of the company such as hospital where security have to face different types of situataions.
I look forward for your prompt reply and appreciate for giving the time to this matter.
Yours Sincerely,
Vikrant
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
You have addressed all three bullet points in the prompt: explaining the reason for the request, specifying the desired hours, and describing the benefits to the employer. However, the development of these points is somewhat limited. For instance, you mention wanting to work 20 hours but do not clearly specify the preferred schedule (e.g., specific days or shifts). The explanation of how your studies benefit the employer is relevant but could be expanded with more professional detail. Overall, the letter is functional and covers the requirements, but it lacks the depth and professional tone expected for a higher band score.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The letter is organized into logical paragraphs, which helps the reader follow your request. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive. For example, the transition between the second and third paragraphs is abrupt. There are also some issues with referencing and sentence flow, such as the phrase 'Because of going back to school it lead to work only 20 hours', which is grammatically awkward and disrupts the logical progression of the argument. Improving the variety of linking words would help the ideas flow more naturally.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.5
Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to communicate your needs clearly. You use some topic-specific terms like 'security supervisor' and 'hands-on training'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice and minor errors, such as 'enroll in police foundation course' (should be 'enrolled in a') and 'situataions' (spelling error). To reach a higher band, you should aim for more sophisticated collocations and ensure that your word forms are accurate in a professional context.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow of reading. Examples include 'I am currently working... and requested to change it' (tense inconsistency), 'it lead to work' (should be 'it will lead to working'), and 'security have to face' (subject-verb agreement). While the meaning remains clear, these persistent errors in basic grammar and verb tense usage prevent the writing from reaching a higher level of accuracy.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.