Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-02
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
You would like to reduce your working hours in order to study part time.
Write a letter to your boss. In your letter
- explain why you want to reduce your working hours
- say which hours you would like to work
- describe how your part-time studies would benefit your employer
You do NOT need to write any addresses.
Begin your letter as follows:
Dear ....................................,
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Dear Madam,
I just writing a letter because I want to take the permission from your side to decrease my shift hours because my parents told me while doing work side by side you need to pursue your study as well they want that I wanted to become a lawyer in the future so I can come to the shop in the evening because I have to attend the classes in the morning it is cup of tea for me but I need to focus on my future as well
I hardly request to you can you please put my shifts in the evening and decrease my hours so, I can focus on my study properly that is the big help from your side If you can accept my request Then I am able to join my university where i want to continue my further study
yours faithfully
Jaswinder kaur
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The letter addresses all three bullet points: the reason for the request, the preferred hours, and the benefits to the employer. However, the development of these ideas is quite limited. The explanation regarding the benefit to the employer is particularly weak, as it only mentions the desire to study law without clearly articulating how this benefits the shop. The tone is also somewhat informal and lacks the professional register expected in a formal letter to a boss. To improve, you should expand on how your studies might add value to the workplace and ensure the tone remains consistently professional throughout.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The letter lacks clear paragraphing and logical progression. The text is essentially two long blocks of run-on sentences, which makes it difficult to follow. There is a lack of cohesive devices; for example, the transition between the reason for the request and the proposed hours is abrupt. The use of punctuation is also problematic, as the absence of full stops creates a stream-of-consciousness effect. To improve, you must use clear paragraph breaks for each main point and incorporate linking words such as 'furthermore', 'consequently', or 'therefore' to connect your ideas logically.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is basic and repetitive, relying on simple phrases like 'do work' and 'big help'. There are also instances of inappropriate idiomatic usage, such as 'it is cup of tea for me', which does not fit the context of a formal request. The range of vocabulary is limited, and the phrasing is often awkward, which hinders the professional impact of the letter. To improve, focus on using more formal business vocabulary and collocations, such as 'request a reduction in hours' instead of 'take the permission from your side'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The grammar is significantly flawed, characterized by a lack of sentence boundaries. Almost the entire letter consists of run-on sentences joined by 'and' or 'so', with very few full stops. There are frequent errors in verb tense and structure, such as 'I just writing' instead of 'I am writing' and 'I hardly request to you' instead of 'I would like to request'. These errors are frequent and occasionally impede the reader's understanding. You need to focus on basic sentence construction, ensuring every sentence has a clear subject, verb, and proper terminal punctuation.
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