Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You would like to reduce your working hours in order to study part time.

Write a letter to your boss. In your letter

  • explain why you want to reduce your working hours
  • say which hours you would like to work
  • describe how your part-time studies would benefit your employer

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Dear sir,

I am writing this in concern of diminishing my hours of working on account of part time study. I am turning to a part time student coming week. I am doing major in business as a result it demands consistency and concentration for productive outcome.

To concern with my study schedule, i would be able to work 20 hours every week. I am available on friday, saturday and sunday however, rest of days i have to attend my classes.

Business study plays significant role in every aspect to deal with demanding sectors. It assist to provide insight regarding sale in innovative method to engage more customer. As i work in food sector it would be very beneficial to attain attention of customer for productive income. other different skills that business study promotes is to understand the proportion between sale earned and labour paid on average income for better clarity of business.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The letter addresses all three bullet points: the reason for the request, the preferred schedule, and the benefits to the employer. However, the development of these points is somewhat limited. While you mention that business studies will help with 'innovative methods' and 'customer engagement,' the explanation remains quite general. To reach a higher band, you should provide more specific examples of how your studies will directly improve your current workplace performance. The tone is generally appropriate for a formal letter, though the opening 'Dear sir' is slightly generic; using 'Dear [Name]' or 'Dear Manager' would be more professional.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The letter is organized into logical paragraphs, each focusing on a specific aspect of the prompt. There is a clear progression of ideas from the request to the schedule and finally the benefits. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally repetitive. For example, the transition 'To concern with my study schedule' is awkward and non-standard. Additionally, the connection between sentences within paragraphs could be smoother to improve the flow. Using a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'consequently,' 'furthermore,' 'in addition') would help the text feel more cohesive.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You have an adequate range of vocabulary to convey your message, but there are several instances of imprecise word choice and awkward collocations. For example, 'diminishing my hours of working' is not standard; 'reducing my working hours' would be more natural. Similarly, 'doing major in business' should be 'majoring in business' or 'studying for a business degree.' The phrase 'attain attention of customer' is also unnatural. While the meaning is clear, the lack of precision in word choice limits the score. Focusing on learning common collocations in a business context will significantly improve your writing.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors. Issues include missing articles ('in food sector'), incorrect verb forms ('It assist to provide'), and punctuation errors (e.g., the lowercase 'i' used for the first-person pronoun). There are also issues with subject-verb agreement and preposition usage, such as 'rest of days i have to attend.' While these errors do not completely impede communication, they are frequent enough to be noticeable. To improve, focus on proofreading for basic errors like capitalization and subject-verb agreement.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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