Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 19 · 2026-08-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

You would like to reduce your working hours in order to study part time.

Write a letter to your boss. In your letter

• explain why you want to reduce your working hours
• say which hours you would like to work
• describe how your part-time studies would benefit your employer

You do NOT need to write any addresses.

Begin your letter as follows:

Dear ....................................,

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Dear Sir,

I'm writing this letter to say that I want to reduce my scheduled working hours to study a part-time course that is going to benefit me and as well as you. As you know that, working in daycares needs diploma for higher opportunities and I only have a assistance certificate for now. I want to study the full diploma program in order to get a higher position and more knowledge about how to handle kids.

I would like to work on Mondays, Wednesdays & Fridays from (9 am - 4 pm), three alternative days so that I can still remain in touch with the kids and also can gain more hands on experience. It's not going to help only me but you as well, as I will be more efficient in my job and you need not to hire two employees for a same position.

I'm happy to provide more information if you want and would really appreciate if you could schedule me according to my working needs.

Thank you for your time and consideration.

Yours faithfully,

Gurleen Kaur

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0

The letter successfully addresses all three bullet points required by the prompt. You clearly explain the motivation for reducing hours (pursuing a diploma for career advancement), specify the requested schedule (Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays), and articulate the benefits to the employer (increased efficiency and reduced staffing needs). The tone is appropriate for a formal request to a supervisor. The ideas are relevant and well-developed, ensuring the reader understands the purpose and the logic behind your request. To reach a higher band, you could expand slightly on how the specific skills gained in the diploma program will directly translate into improved performance in your current daycare setting.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 7.0

The letter is logically organized, with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. Each paragraph focuses on a specific aspect of the request, which aids readability. You use some cohesive devices, such as 'As you know', 'In order to', and 'not only... but... as well', which help connect your ideas. However, the flow could be improved by using a wider variety of linking words to transition between sentences more smoothly. For instance, the transition between your motivation and the proposed schedule is a bit abrupt. Overall, the progression of ideas is clear, and the paragraphing is appropriate for a formal letter.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'diploma program', 'efficient', and 'consideration'. There are some minor inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'assistance certificate' (likely 'assistant certificate') and 'handle kids' (which is slightly informal; 'care for children' would be more professional). While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning clearly, it lacks the sophistication and precision required for higher bands. To improve, focus on using more precise professional terminology and ensuring collocations are natural, such as 'hands-on experience' rather than 'hands on experience'.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as 'I'm writing this letter to say that I want to reduce...' and 'It's not going to help only me but you as well, as I will be...'. While your meaning is always clear, there are several grammatical errors, such as 'working in daycares needs diploma' (missing articles: 'a diploma') and 'you need not to hire' (should be 'you would not need to hire'). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are some minor errors in sentence construction. Increasing the variety of complex structures and focusing on article usage and verb patterns will help improve your score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.